


20 Ways to Say I Love You

by adarna



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Awkward First Times, First Kiss, M/M, Stagedorks - side, expensive headphones, if you like chloe then you probably shouldnt read this, nvm it's going to be a threeshot bc this shit is hella long, sooo keep an open mind, this is a twoshot btw, this was my very first bmc fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-09
Updated: 2018-08-18
Packaged: 2019-06-24 17:08:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 42,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15635046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adarna/pseuds/adarna
Summary: Neither Rich nor Michael are good at saying those three important words, but they have other ways to express them.orA fic that shows the different stages of their relationship after the whole SQUIP incident.





	1. PART 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm reposting this again because a lot of my readers want me to! Please keep in mind that I wrote this when I was just new to the fandom and have not read any fics at all which means there might be some headcanons here that the majority of you guys won't agree with. 
> 
> This is going to be a twoshot, by the way. I'm still in the process of editing the second half!

# 1\. “You don’t have to say anything.”

_“Michael is in the premises.”_

_“...Michael’s here?”_

_“Affirmative. If you want to be the real star of this party, perhaps it’s about time we finally substantiate to your friends that you don’t hold any kind of fascination for him.”_

_“You still on that? I’m not doing shit.”_

_“What are you doing-- I would advise against that, Richard.”_

_“Leave me alone, will ya?”_

_“Alcohol is not an ideal selection for coping. I am all that you need, right here.”_

_“Shut up.”_

_“You will not be able to make it through the night without me.”_

_“I said leave me the fuck alone already!”_

Their exchange rings in his head over and over again as he lumbers his way through the thick throng of party-goers, the familiar warmth of alcohol already overwhelming his entire stature. He couldn’t hear his SQUIP anymore but he knows she’ll be back and once she is, she will show no mercy over how he had deliberately turned her off for the night. He doesn’t normally like shutting her down, especially since she gives him a purpose in life.

But he isn’t just feeling it tonight.

The desire to not get shoved into a locker.

The desperation to fit in.

The longing for that consensual intimacy.

Somehow, none of those matter to him at the moment. They all seem pointless when he still has a fucked up home to go to at the end of the day. With a father who, in a perpetual intoxicated stupor, beats him senseless and an older brother who pretends as if there’s absolutely nothing wrong with their lives, it only makes sense why Rich firmly believes his SQUIP is the only one who has always been there for him. She improved his life and prevented him from jumping off the ledge-- what more could he ask for?

He pulls his Jason mask up to the top of his head and chugs on his can of Pabst Blue Ribbon as though trying to drown out his SQUIP’s plan of publicly humiliating Michael in front of everyone at the party. Jake and the others have been suspicious of the way he targets Michael specifically in the hallways and no matter how hard Rich has tried telling them that he targets Jeremy as well, they don’t seem convinced at all. He thought that writing “BOYF-REINDS” on those dweebs’ backpacks would have been enough to prove that he absolutely has no fascination for Michael, but apparently that just made things worse for him.

He’s lucky that he still at least got invited to the party.

_“You will not be able to make it through the night without me.”_

His SQUIP’s words still continue to haunt him in spite of being shut off and he mentally curses himself for that. What’s the point of getting rid of her when he’s already gotten so used to having her around?

Rich groans in annoyance as he pushes past the crowd and climbs up the stairs, tossing the empty can away from his grip. The deafening music booms into his ears and straight into his skull, an inevitable headache gradually making its way to his brain. He needs to get somewhere quiet just so he could close his eyes for five minutes. Five fucking minutes. That’s all he needs.

He nearly loses his balance when Jeremy passes by from the bathroom, knocking his shoulder in the process.

“Watch where you’re going, man.” Rich tries to yell but it only comes out half-heartedly and he’s almost certain Jeremy didn’t even notice him.

_Shit, Jeremy didn’t notice him._

Rich stops in his tracks and leans back against the wall, feeling his knees ready to buckle underneath him. He’s so goddamn woozy and frustrated. Not even Jeremy could notice him if he doesn’t have his SQUIP around. What the hell has he done? He really can’t function without her. He’s invisible. He runs his hand over his face before patting both of his cheeks in an attempt to get himself on high alert.

“Hello?” Jenna Rolan’s voice catches his attention and he looks off to the side to find her knocking at the bathroom door, dancing in a frantic jig. “Some of us have to pee!”

 _“I’m having my period!”_ A familiar voice says from the other side of the door.

Rich blinks, trying to put a face to that voice.

Oh wait, that sounded like Michael. Does that mean Jeremy was in the bathroom with him earlier?

“Take your time, honey.” Jenna then rushes back downstairs to probably piss outside, not even giving Rich a single glance. He feels a sinking sensation in his stomach at that and accidentally throws his head back against the wall harsher than intended. He grunts in pain and slides down to the floor, bringing his knees up and crossing his arms over them as he sighs.

If his SQUIP is with him right now, she would most likely be telling him to check up on Michael who’s clearly locking himself up in the bathroom for a reason that could be used to their advantage. She had this elaborate plan of Rich faking an interest in him only to push him into what could be seen as the greatest public humiliation of the year. However, the only flaw in that supposedly intricate plan of hers is that his interest in Michael is nowhere near fake at all.

And she knows that. Why else would she push him into harassing the guy 24/7?

Rich runs his fingers through his dirty blond hair and stares ahead for a few minutes in an attempt to ease his headache before deciding to stand up and head for the bathroom. He brings his hand up to knock on the door but hesitates. What would he even say?

_“Show suspicion as to why he was alone with Jeremy in the bathroom. It will increase his anxiety level and that will give you the upper hand in the situation.”_

Rich imagines his SQUIP telling him those exact words and he immediately shakes the thought away. Fuck no. He’s not going with her plan, at least not tonight. She’s not in his head right now. She can’t control him. He drags a deep intake of breath before reaching up to finally knock on the door.

No answer.

His brows knit to a confused frown as he tries knocking again but still receives the same result. He tries twisting the doorknob only to find out that it’s been locked.

“Err…” He leans in a bit. “Michael? Hey dweeb, you in there?”

A few seconds of silence pass by until finally, Michael speaks up.

 _“Ocupado…?”_ His voice comes out strangely hoarse.

Rich rolls his eyes in disbelief. “Well unless you’re dropping a giant steaming one in there, I’m assuming you’re hiding from everyone because you’re not even supposed to be here to begin with.”

Silence.

 _“D-Don’t you have a ring to take to Mordor or something?”_ Michael speaks up again.

Rich frowns. “Hey, screw you, man. I was just checking up on you. No need to get personal here.”

_“...wow, you got the reference.”_

Rich stops at that and mentally curses himself again. Damn, caught in his own trap. He really does need his SQUIP to keep him in line. He shakes his head and knocks on the door again. “Let me in, dude.”

A few more seconds pass by before Michael seemingly makes up his mind and finally pulls the door open. Rich is surprised to find the nerd’s eyes completely bloodshot and somewhat swollen under his glasses as if he’s been crying in the bathroom this whole time. But before he could even have the chance to react, Michael averts his eyes down and tries to push past him.

Rich stops him from doing so by putting his hand on his chest. “Whoa, where are you going?”

Michael swats his hand away, a grimace crossing his features. “I’m doing everyone a favor. I’m leaving.”

There’s no way Rich could just let him leave like a total mess. He doesn’t know who else in the party has their SQUIP with them and if their SQUIP takes notice of Michael, then things will definitely get messy. Not many people target Michael as much as he does but this could be their opportunity to be ‘the star’ of the party. He looks back over his shoulder to make sure nobody is around to watch before nudging Michael back into the bathroom and joining him.

“What are you doing?” Michael asks tiredly as Rich locks the door behind him.

“I’m doing _you_ a favor.” He tells him.

“I’m really not in the mood for whatever prank you have in store for me. I’m exhausted and I just want to go home.”

“It’s not safe yet.”

“And being with you is safer?”

“I’m the best option you’ve got right now.”

“You know, I don’t have anything to say to you. If it weren’t for you, I’d be with Jeremy right now.”

Rich crosses his arms and leans back against the door, eyeing Michael from head to toe. “Is that what you’ve been crying about?” Michael visibly flinches at that. “Did you guys have a lovers’ quarrel in here?”

“Lovers’ quarrel?” Michael breathes out a bitter drained laugh. “That’s original.”

Rich purses his lips and diverts his eyes anywhere but the boy he’s been pining for since freshman year. He didn’t mean to sound taunting but his words apparently came out that way. If anything, he spoke out of genuine jealousy and now he wishes he would have said something else.

“What’s your SQUIP telling you now?” Michael breaks the silence and Rich looks back at him.

He shrugs. “Nothing. I shut her down for now.”

“Your SQUIP’s a girl?”

“Looks like my mom.”

“Freaky. That would explain the lack of wit in your taunt.” He pauses as though looking back on his words. “And I mean because she’s not around-- not because she’s a woman.”

“Yeah, I got it.”

Rich watches Michael sit down on the edge of the tub and take his glasses off to wipe his eyes with the cuff of his sleeve. Whatever happened here, it must have been really serious. He’s never seen Michael this down, even when he continuously harassed him in the hallway. The guy has always been in high spirits and perfectly content with being himself despite everyone telling him that he shouldn’t be.

It’s strange seeing him this way.

But Michael is human just like the rest of them and maybe every now and then he also gets brought down by some insecurities that he tries so hard to overlook. Rich remembers what that is like-- to tell himself that everything will get better after graduation and he won’t ever have to look back at the people who made his high school life a living hell. The only problem is that he doesn’t have the tolerance to last until graduation, not like Michael.

But it looks like the pressure is getting to him now as well.

Rich’s first instinct is to offer him a SQUIP like he usually does but if Michael does take the pill, he wouldn’t be _Michael_ anymore. He’d be a completely different person. And on top of that, he will have to live his days with that voice in his head constantly telling him what he should and shouldn’t do.

He can’t do that to him.

“We didn’t have a lovers’ quarrel,” Michael speaks up again, his eyes fixated on the white tiled floor. “because we’re not even ‘lovers’ to begin with as I have told you many times.”

“I know. Jeremy obviously has the hots for that theater chick.”

“Christine.”

“Whatever. What were you crying over then?”

Silence looms over them again and Rich eyes Michael, seeing him lost in thought. Should he say something? He’s been there before after all-- except nobody was there to wonder whether or not they should say something to lift his spirits up. He really likes Michael, but he doesn’t know him enough to be certain of the right words to say in this situation. He scratches his head and steps away from the door, taking a few steps closer to his selected companion before leaning back against the sink.

“Look, man. You don’t have to say anything.” He says, earning a glance from the other. “It’s not like you owe me an explanation anyway. Whatever kind of fight you had with Jeremy, it’ll blow over.”

“You say that like you don’t know how a SQUIP works.” Michael shakes his head.

“Oh… yeah. Right. You got me there. Sorry.”

Michael then stares at him in what appears to be awe, much to Rich’s discomfort. The blond looks back over his shoulder just to be sure if he really is the one being stared at and after realizing that there’s nothing exactly eye-catching behind him aside from his reflection in the mirror, he looks back at Michael.

“What?”

“Did you just apologize to me?”

Heat immediately warms up Rich’s face and he clears his throat before shrugging his shoulders as nonchalantly as he could. “Y-Yeah, so what?” He scratches his cheek. “P-Popular guys… No, I mean cool dudes say sorry too. Sometimes. I-I think… Quit staring, man!”

For the first time since he saw him tonight, he finally hears a genuinely pleased chuckle from Michael. “You’re a dork.”

Rich frowns, though it lacks the annoyed tinge that it should have. “Was that supposed to be an insult?”

“Not at all.” Michael smiles and Rich feels his heart skip a beat at the sight. “I think I like you better SQUIP-less.”

Rich blinks. “Wait, really…?”

“You’re less of an asshole than you usually are. You're more tolerable this way.”

Rich feels a swell of happiness in his chest and tries his very best not to smile too much at the first compliment Michael has ever given him. It’s not the best but since it came from Michael himself, it beats the rest of the compliments he got from the popular clique who only ever wanted to get to his good side. He could never have even imagined himself having a private conversation with the guy, even if they were back in freshman year. He was completely invisible to everyone at that time after all-- including Michael who was already joined at the hip with Jeremy by then. And when they did have those small chances of interaction (such as working on group projects), Rich would usually be a blushing mess while muddling his words and making his lisp worse.

Michael never really seemed to care though. It was almost like he never even noticed. He was literally the only one who never made fun of him.

But now Rich realizes _he_ wasn’t the sole reason why Michael never noticed him back then.

Michael just doesn’t talk to other people in general. He is perfectly in content with just having Jeremy by his side.

“Say…” Rich starts, rubbing the back of his neck. “...you don’t remember me freshman year, right?”

Michael seems to ponder on that for a few seconds before shaking his head. “I don’t remember anyone slamming me into lockers or calling me a fag around that time, no.”

Rich fights back a wince at that. “Oh… err… well…”

“No way,” Michael beats him to it, realization dawning on his face. “you were just like Jeremy, weren’t you? You felt invisible until… is that why you bought a SQUIP?”

“I _was_ invisible.” Rich frowns at him. “But I feel like having a SQUIP is pointless now.”

“Because you’re finally popular?”

“Because it’s physically and mentally draining.”

“...oh.”

Rich nods his head. “And… you know…” He waves his hand in the air. “...you said you like me better without my SQUIP so--” In an instant, crushing pain strikes his brain and he’s suddenly blinded by flashing spots obscuring his sight.

“Aagh!” He hunches over and grips his head, the throbbing pain growing unbearable.

“Rich!” Michael is quick to his side. “Dude, what’s wrong?”

 _“Richard!”_ His SQUIP is back, but her voice comes and goes. _“What did I tell you about-- Get out-- Michael-- You are ruining-- You can’t rule-- Obey--”_

“Rich?!” Michael calls for his attention again in clear panic but Rich desperately shoves him away. He needs to get away from him, especially now that his SQUIP is back to get rid of him for sure.

“J-Just get outta here!” Rich snaps at him, grabbing his Jason mask and tossing it to Michael. “Make sure nobody sees you!”

“I-Is it your SQUIP?! I can’t just leave you--”

“Just go!”

After a few seconds of hesitation, Michael puts the mask over his face and rushes out of the bathroom. Rich drops to his knees and grips his hair tightly, pain violently throbbing around his skull as though it’s ready to be cracked open. This is his SQUIP’s doing. She’s punishing him for deliberately shutting her down against her better judgment.

Finally, the pain fades away and he slumps to the floor-- breathing heavily.

_“Richard…”_

Rich slowly looks up to find his SQUIP kneeling down beside him and giving him a stern but gentle look. _“You know I hate doing that to you but you must know that I do it out of love.”_

Rich tries to straighten up as he nods his head and rubs his temples. “I know.”

_“Good boy. Now, I have reviewed the data from this evening and frankly, I am disappointed that you went after Michael without my supervision. You’re fortunate that neither Jake nor Jenna saw you two together. It would have destroyed years’ worth of hard work.”_

“Yeah, sorry about that.”

_“Easy mistake to make. We will have to be more careful from now on. But it appears we have at least earned just a bit of Michael’s trust and we can use that to our advantage.”_

“You’re not seriously still going to--”

_“Jake’s suspicion is a threat to your social status, Richard.”_

"I can't do that to Michael."

_"No, we're not going to reduce him to humiliation anymore."_

"What?"

_"I now believe the boy deserves a SQUIP of his own."_

Rich pauses for a few seconds. “...no.”

_“...excuse me?”_

“I’m getting rid of you.”

_“Are you sure about that? Are you ready to go home without me by your side?”_

Rich stops and hesitates. He still needs her, he knows that. She knows the right words to make him say when facing his father and while it doesn’t completely prevent him from getting beaten up, it does lower those chances. But for how long is he going to keep this up? Is he really going to live out his life with someone in his head forever? He won’t ever be allowed to at least be friendly with Michael, not when _she’s_ up there.

He needs alcohol. He needs to get completely wasted in order to keep her out longer. And after that…

...he’ll have to look for some Mountain Dew Red.

 

# 2\. “You don’t have to say anything.” Pt. 2

_“The guy wasn’t even drunk when he did it. He just completely snapped like that!”_

_“He wasn’t high either! To think that he would burn Dillinger's house down… do you think they’re fighting over a girl?”_

_“Ugh, maybe he’s been going through something really bad. Oh! Why don’t we change our profile pictures to his to show our support?”_

_“Nice! Because then we’d be, like, totally spreading awareness and stuff right?”_

_“We should do a hashtag. Maybe #JusticeforRich?”_

_“Justice? What would he need justice for?”_

_“It doesn’t matter as long as it sounds supportive.”_

Michael shakes his head in utter disgust and disbelief as he puts his headphones back onto his ears and plays Joy Division’s Disorder on full blast in an attempt to tune out everyone’s bullshit. The second he heard them mentioning that Rich didn’t have a single drop of liquor on the night of Jake’s party, he immediately knew that nobody in school is a credible source on what really happened considering how he knows for a fact that Rich _did_ drink-- he had reeked of alcohol when he had locked himself with him in the bathroom.

There is a twinge of guilt twisting in his chest though. The last time he saw Rich, he was nearly writhing in pain and as much as he wanted to help, the blond wouldn’t let him and made him run out instead. It doesn’t take a genius to see that his SQUIP definitely had something to do with it but Michael knows there wasn’t much he could do-- not when the pain was granted by a quantum nanotechnology CPU. Did his SQUIP want something to do to _him_ specifically? Is that why Rich was so desperate to get him out of there?

And why would his SQUIP make him burn down a house? What was the motive behind that?

He skids his steps to a quick pause when he spots Jeremy walking down the hall and his first instinct is to wave him over… until he remembers what happened between them on the night of the party. A scowl crosses his features and he shakes his head before carrying on to his next class, keeping his gaze down from any chances of eye contact. Not that it would matter though.

He’s invisible to everyone here.

* * *

Michael stands stiffly in front of the door, his hand gripping nervously onto the strap of his backpack while the other fiddles with a loose strand he caught from his red hoodie. Knowing how popular Rich is, there’s a high chance that his room would be full of people right now. It would definitely cause suspicion if he comes in uninvited, especially since he and Rich aren’t exactly the closest of friends.

Still, he needs to get the full _actual_ story. There’s no way Rich just burned down a house willy-nilly. In fact, there’s no way he would have literally burned an _entire house_ down-- especially a house that’s as unnecessarily colossal as Jake’s. Michael sighs before leaning in to try to listen on any familiar voices from the room but after several seconds of waiting, he doesn’t hear a word. If anything, it seems far too quiet in there.

That must be good then. He won’t be a disturbance.

With somewhat renewed confidence, Michael knocks on the door.

 _“Dad?”_ Rich calls out without missing a beat and Michael winces at that. The dude is obviously expecting someone else but there’s no turning back now.

“Uh, no. It’s Michael.”

_“Michael...?”_

“Yeah… Can I come in?”

_“Err… Sure, I guess.”_

Michael pushes the door open and peeks inside first, finding Rich lying on a bed in a full body cast. It doesn’t look like a private room either but the other bed is thankfully vacant. Michael steps in and looks around, relieved that nobody else is in inside but is taken aback by the absence of balloons, flowers, or even teddy bears anywhere. Is it not a social norm to bring any of those when visiting someone in the hospital? Shit, maybe that only works in movies. Now he feels ridiculous buying a Get Well Soon teddy bear.

“What are you doing here?” Rich’s question brings him out of his thoughts and Michael realizes that he’s been standing awkwardly by the door.

“Oh, right.” He closes the door behind him and strides up ahead near the blond. “Just… wanted to see how you’re doing.”

“Well, I sure am having the time of my life.” Rich says rather bitterly, though Michael could somehow tell the tone isn’t exactly directed to him. But as if realizing this, Rich adds in a lighter attitude, “are you... wearin’ _jorts?_ ”

Michael looks down at his outfit and nods. “Yeah, these are my favorite pair.”

“Wow. You’re serious.”

Michael smiles a bit. “Thanks. Is your SQUIP with you?”

Rich sighs and looks up at the ceiling before slowly nodding his head. “Yeah. But the doctor gave me this pretty rad painkiller so she can’t hurt me. Nor can she move me. I insisted on this full body cast.”

“What’s she saying right now?”

“She’s trying to initiate Optic Nerve Blocking.”

“Optic Nerve…”

“She’s trying to block you from my line of vision. But it’s not working for some reason. Must be something in the medicine doc gave me.”

Is that what Jeremy’s SQUIP has been doing? Is that why Jeremy hasn’t been giving him a single ounce of attention anymore? Shit, it looks like that pill is stronger than he was lead to believe.

“You’re not my mom. Shut the fuck up.” Rich suddenly says and Michael flinches before giving him a questioning look. Rich closes his eyes and shakes his head. “Sorry, I was talking to her. She keeps trying to talk over my own thoughts.”

“Uh… oh yeah.” Michael quickly unhooks his bag from his shoulders and zips it open to pull out a bottle of calamansi juice. “My mom made this for you. I told her you got into a freaky fire accident and she said calamansi juice helps speed up the healing process for burn scars. Dunno if that’s true but hey, I trust her word.” He takes out a straw as well and uncaps the bottle to slip it inside before leaning in and moving the bottle closer to Rich who, in turn, gives him a look of incredulity and suspicion.

Michael rolls his eyes. “Fine, you caught me. I also poured half a bottle of drain cleaner in there to get the job done.”

“Why didn’t you say so?” Rich then takes a sip through the straw before pulling away and seemingly taking the flavor in. “Huh, tastes like lemonade… but sweet.”

“Yep, that’s drain cleaner for you.”

“I like it. Tell Mrs. Mell I said thanks.”

“Sure.” Michael sets the bottle down on the bedside table then grabs the chair nearby to make himself comfortable. He looks around for a moment again then redirects his attention on Rich. “You know, I kinda thought your room would be flowering with vibrant colors by now. Chloe and Brooke seem like the type of people who like to give extravagant gifts just to show that they can.”

Rich is silent for a while, but then he shakes his head. “Nah, man. Aside from my doc and a few pretty nurses, you’re my first visitor. By far, hopefully.”

Michael stares at him in bewilderment, wondering why that was said so nonchalantly. “But… you’ve been here since the other night, right? What about your family?”

Rich lets out a bitter-sounding laugh. “Dude, I just wasted my family’s hard earned money for being a fucking idiot. Hospital bills are no joke. It only makes sense why they can’t stand to look at me right now.”

That doesn’t sound right.

“So what are you really doing here?” Rich changes the topic, obviously avoiding their previous one. “I mean, I like the company but there’s no way you’d visit your own school bully in the hospital just to 'check up on him’, right?”

Damn, now Michael feels guilty over how partially right he is.

“I want to know the whole story. What really happened.” He admits a bit sheepishly.

“Great.” Rich throws his head back against his pillow. “What has Jenna been telling people?”

“You don’t want to know.” Michael fishes his phone out from his pocket and opens his Facebook app before tapping on Chloe’s profile page that shows that she changed her profile picture to a selfie she had taken with Rich at some music festival with the caption, _‘my guy bff is in the hospital right now bc of a freak accident thats totally not his fault. rich, i know youre going through a rough time rn so im sending my thoughts and prayers. i just want you to know that whether youre gay or not, youre still my bff (or gbf)! you were born this way, baby! love you rich!! #justiceforrich’._

“Here, check this out.” He says, showing the screen to Rich.

Rich squints his eyes and tries to get a better look at the caption before his expression turns sour at the sight. “What the fuck?”

“Yeah.” Michael slips his phone back into his pocket. “Everyone’s been doing it-- changing their profile pictures to either pictures of you or pictures of them hanging out with you. It’s to show that they support you.”

“But…” Rich looks confused. “...they haven’t even come to see me yet.”

“It’s slacktivism at its finest, man. They’re showing their support just to feed their egos.”

Now Rich looks hurt and Michael couldn’t help but hate the fact that he has to be the bearer of bad news. It’s not like he expected the guy’s friends not to show up at all though. He sighs and awkwardly rubs the back of his neck, not knowing what to say next. Rich is still obviously taking this all in… or maybe he’s talking to his SQUIP. It’s hard to tell. But he definitely hates seeing him like this. Sure the dude’s tormented him throughout high school, but now he knows it’s all because he was under the control of his SQUIP and his desperation to fit in with the popular kids. While he hasn’t necessarily forgiven him yet, Michael could sort of see where he’s coming from.

He then rummages through his backpack again and pulls out the teddy bear he bought earlier that has the words “Get well soon!” written on it. He’s not entirely sure if this is going to lift his spirits up but it’s better to try.

“What’s that?” Rich suddenly asks and Michael slightly jumps in surprise.

“Oh, it’s… err, a teddy bear.” He waves it casually before carefully placing it down beside Rich’s pillow. “A Get Well Soon teddy bear. I dunno, I think it’s for good luck…? Yeah, it’s lame but I figured why not, right? The store was near the hospital anyway and I just got my allowance. It would kinda suck if I came here without bringing anything that says ‘Get well soon’ on it. If you don’t like it, I can just take it back and use it the next time a dude gets into a freak accident. You know what, this is probably making you feel weird so I’m just gonna take it back. Sorry. I didn’t mean to make things awkward--”

“No!” Rich calls out the second Michael is about to reach for the bear again. As though taken aback by his own outburst, Rich clears his throat and awkwardly shakes his head. “I mean, leave it. It’ll… like, keep me company. At least.”

“Oh.” Michael withdraws his hand. “Okay.” He then settles back down on his chair and taps his fingers on his legs.

“So…” Rich starts. “You said you want to know the full story?”

“Yeah.” Michael nods. “But you don’t have to say anything if you don’t want to.”

“No, I want to.” Rich sighs. “It’d be nice to at least have one person know what actually happened. Something tells me Jake will just entertain those rumors.”

“Yeah, that sounds just like him.”

Rich grows quiet again though his expression is twisting to an annoyed grimace this time and Michael could tell he’s having another mental argument with his SQUIP. It must be hard having to argue with someone in your head all the time. Eventually, Rich sighs again and gives him a fleeting glance.

“My SQUIP knew you were at the party before I even found you.” He admits and Michael’s eyes widen in surprise.

“How did she…”

“She’s linked together with someone else’s SQUIP who found you sneaking in.” Rich purses his lips and looks away. “She had this whole elaborate plan of humiliating you in front of everyone at the party, but I couldn’t do it. She wouldn’t leave me alone so I had to get myself wasted to shut her off.”

“Alcohol shuts down a SQUIP?”

“Temporarily, yeah.”

That must be why Jeremy could see him that night.

“Why didn’t you want to do it?” He pushes cautiously.

“I’m not a monster, dude.” Rich makes a movement as though he’s trying to shrug his shoulders but the cast prevents him from doing so. “Then I found you and I couldn’t just let you leave the bathroom looking like the way you looked.”

“Gee, thanks.”

“No, I meant you looked like you were just bawling your eyes out. That is like a gateway to getting picked on for being… well, you know…”

Michael arches a brow. “Gay?”

“Yeah.” Rich nods, discomfort in his tone. “Some of the people at the party have SQUIPs too so it was too much of a risk for you.”

“So…” Michael thinks it over, a dawning realization hitting him. “...you were trying to save me?”

“Not really.” Rich still sounds awkward. “I just did what any decent human being would do when not under the command of a SQUIP. But mine eventually came rushing back and sorta punished me for shutting her off.”

“Wait, was that--”

“The headache, yeah. When you left, I realized that I really needed to get rid of her. So I got myself even more wasted and as soon as she was out of my system again, I started looking for some Mountain Dew Red.”

“Red…?”

“It’s what permanently shuts a SQUIP down.” Rich clarifies.

“But Mountain Dew Red got discontinued in the 90’s.”

“No way, really?” Rich looks at him before letting out a chuckle of disbelief. “Heh, must be why I couldn’t find one at the party. I don’t drink Mountain Dew in general so I thought that red shit was common. And since finding it took me a long time, my SQUIP eventually came back and I knew I couldn’t handle another drop of beer. But then Dustin Kropp told me he knew where I can get Mountain Dew Red. But before he could even tell me, my SQUIP suddenly took over my body. It turned out she wanted me to SQUIP the whole school. I tried to fight back but I was no match for her. Jake… Jake was there and was trying to help. I just started thrashing around. I was so desperate to get rid of her, I wasn't thinking straight. I..." He swallowed. "I tried to kill myself."

"So, the fire..."

"It was stupid, I know. I didn't want to drag anyone down with me and yet, I put a lot of people's lives at stake. I didn't burn the house down, but the fire did a lot of damage. Jake broke his legs trying to get me out.”

Michael looks away from Rich and stares down at the floor, digesting all this newfound information. Just as he had expected, the rumors circulating the school are all downright ridiculous. Rich didn’t burn a house down. He was completely wasted. He was under the control of his SQUIP. And Jake didn’t break his legs saving himself but rather saving Rich. And on top of that, Rich didn’t want to humiliate him at all. Who knew he still has a shred of human decency in him?

“Say, you don’t happen to know anyone who has Mountain Dew Red, do you?” Rich asks, successfully grabbing his attention again.

Michael ponders on it for a moment. “I know a store… but I don’t know if they have that specifically. I’m gonna have to do some research.”

“Okay, cool.” Rich nods understandingly. “...were you able to leave the party safely?”

“Uh… yeah.”

“What were you doing in the bathroom with Jeremy anyway? Just curious. You don't have to tell me if you don't want to.”

Tension suddenly locks Michael’s entire frame, his mind reeling in the event that took place at the party. Jeremy had accused him of being jealous and even called him a “loser” which ended up hurting more than Michael was prepared for. He had always thought that he was used to being seen as such but when the word came from Jeremy himself, it broke him. He thought he didn't care how others see him as long as he had Jeremy by his side, but now he had come to realize that that wasn't the case at all.

He’s not alone by choice. He _physically cannot_ talk to anyone at school that isn't Jeremy. He didn’t think he ever had to. He wasn’t lonely-- not when he had his best friend by his side. Whenever he’s with Jeremy, he can be comfortable in his own skin. Just the mere thought of meeting new people then eventually finding out all the shit they've been talking about him behind his back terrifies him.

He’s paranoid, he knows that, but he can't help it.

Jeremy obviously finds him suffocating but still tolerated him for years and they've been friends since kindergarten. He couldn’t think of a single person who could put up with him as much as Jeremy has.

“It was… dumb.” He finally says after a moment of hesitation. “We got into this fight and… it made me realize that I have no one else but him in my life.”

Rich is quiet for a few seconds. “No one else? Like, you don’t have any other friends aside from that tall ass?”

“Yeah.” Michael lets out a lackluster laugh at the classic nickname. “That night, I kinda realized that I don’t matter to anyone and that’s no one’s fault but mine. I’m not interesting, and I don’t _try_ to be interesting like Jeremy does. And it’s not because I don’t care-- it’s... because I’m scared. I’m scared and paranoid. But Jeremy… Jeremy makes me feel like I can be myself without having to give a damn what others think. He likes me for me and having that kind of person by my side is enough. But lately, it’s been hard. Especially now that he’s realized that he could do better. He's obviously doing fine without me but I can't function without him and--” He immediately stops when he realizes how much he’s sharing to the last person he wants to share anything with. How the hell did that happen?  Has he really been this lonely since his _only_ friend left him? He frowns and clears his throat. “Well… that’s that. I just find it hard to talk to people, that's all.”

He refuses to meet Rich’s eyes, now far too embarrassed to look at his reaction. He _knows_ this isn't going to end well. He nearly got emotional in front of the worst bully in school after all and there's no denying that Rich will use his moment of weakness to his advantage. He might as well mentally prepare himself for it.

Finally, Rich responds. “You’re talking to me right now, aren’t you?”

The unexpected response is enough for Michael to look up at him, taken aback. There is not a hint of sarcasm or anything biting in the blond’s tone. And what he just said makes sense. Michael just opened up to him and he still can't quite figure out what made him do it. “I…” he starts, speechless. “...I mean, yeah, I guess.”

“Ugh, fuck.” Rich suddenly grunts, his face twisting in a pained grimace.

Michael quickly stands up from his seat and steps closer to his side. “D-Dude, are you okay? Are your meds wearing off?”

“Yeah…” Rich grunts out an answer. “She’s… doing it again… shit…”

“I-Il call for help! Just stay here, yeah?”

“Gee, I-I’ll try not to spread my wings and f-fucking fly out of this damn room.”

“That’s the spirit. I’ll be right back.” And with that, Michael rushes out of the room to call for a nurse.

 

# 3\. “Pull over. Let me drive for a while.”

Michael should have known better than to go to the party without his PT Cruiser. It may be a piece of shit, but it’s _his_ piece of shit. While it was nice to see Christine so adorably excited to be driving him and Jeremy to the party with her brand new car, he still should have seen the likelihood of those two eventually forgetting that they even brought him along the second their raging hormones got the better of them. He doesn’t take it personally though, not when Jeremy might finally lose his virginity tonight. So when he saw the pair leave the party and drive away, Michael had merely shrugged his shoulders before joining Richard Goranski again as they watched Jake attempt to do a keg stand.

Who would have thought, right?

Maybe if the SQUIP was never destroyed, he would still be in his basement on this very same evening-- smoking a big fat joint by himself and wallowing in his rebounding loathing for Jeremy’s betrayal.

But now everyone in school has pretty much acknowledged the fact that he saved them. Why would he even be invited to Jake’s party after all? He didn’t want to go at first (no matter how flattering it is) but frankly, he’s weak to Jeremy’s whiny pleas. That guy is just so good at that, even back in kindergarten when Michael had refused to color Pacman pink on his coloring book before finally giving in when Jeremy had practically begged him to just so he could impress Samantha Stevenson. But then she transferred to a different school the following week and Michael was left with the knowledge that he had colored his favorite character inaccurately _on purpose._

Sure, it was just one page but it still bothered him so much that he had to throw the entire book straight into the trash.

“Whoa.” He jumps out of his reverie and grips onto his seat belt when he felt the car swerve a bit to the side but, fortunately, it manages to linger back on the road. He directs his gaze at the driver with an unimpressed frown, somehow not liking the exhausted half-lidded look on the guy’s eyes and the way he’s swaying from left to right ever so slightly. The scatter of burn scars on his arms are now barely noticeable in the dark.

“Uh… Rich?” He tries to get his attention as he adjusts his spectacles. “Why don’t I drive?”

“Huh?” Rich makes a small movement with his head but doesn’t take his eyes off the road, thankfully. “What? No, man. I’m fine. I’m just tired and a little bit tipsy, totally not drunk. Totally. You’ll _know_ when I’m drunk because if I were, I would be getting it on with some hot chick right now instead of driving you home.” He stops for a beat then adds as an afterthought. “Or with a hot dude. You know, ‘cause I’m totally bi.”

“Yeah, we get it. You’re bi.” Michael couldn’t refrain himself from rolling his eyes as he turns to look out the window from his own side again. “Dude, why do you always keep squeezing that fact into every conversation? Who are you even convincing anymore?”

“I’m not convincing anyone.” Rich sounds a little hurt and Michael suddenly feels bad for his unnecessary snappiness. “It just… feels good to finally say that out loud-- now with my SQUIP gone from my head.”

Michael turns to look at him again with a raised brow. “Your SQUIP held you back from expressing your sexuality?”

“Yeah, man.” Rich runs his fingers through his red-streaked blond hair before placing them back on the steering wheel. “I fucking hated it. Do you have any idea how much it sucked having to make fun of you for being out of the closet when I, myself, was still locked up in it? It was so damn--” A hiccup trips his words but he doesn’t let that stop him. “--hypocritical. It was like… I dunno, I was popular but I hated myself so much.” Another hiccup comes in but the blond doesn’t seem bothered at all.

Michael notices that his companion’s lisp has made its return once again and strangely enough, he feels more comfortable when it does. It reminds him that Rich is just being Rich now-- no SQUIP to be his puppeteer.

“Yep, you’re the real-life embodiment of a stereotypical jock. All you need is to wear your letterman jacket and you’ll look like the part.” He breathes out a laugh. “But kidding aside, it’s good that you’re out now and you didn’t even get kicked out of the football team which is sadly a common thing. I’m surprised Jake didn’t care either.”

“Oh he cared,” Rich says after another hiccup, the vehicle swerving a bit again to the side before resuming back on its lane. “he was all, _‘Wait, you’re not having gay thoughts about me, are you?’_ That bastard.”

Michael clicks his tongue and shakes his head. “I’m not surprised. What did you say?”

“I said no, of course! But I think that hurt him because now he wouldn’t stop asking me what he should do to have dudes be all over him as much as girls are. Like, how should I know?”

Michael’s brows bump together in a frown. “What, is he bi too?”

“Nah.” Another hiccup. “He’s as straight as a middle-aged barbecue-grilling suburban white dad.”

Michael laughs at that, trying his very best not to point out that that’s the kind of vibe he used to get from Rich himself. Of course, things are different now considering the fact that the dude is out of the closet but it’s still pretty fucking hilarious. And not to his surprise, Rich laughs along with him and he realizes how strangely easy it is to be laughing with him. It’s weird but easy. It reminds him back when he had visited him in the hospital nearly every day and surprisingly finding himself liking the guy who was known to be _The Bully_ in school. He would never have liked him at all if Rich hadn’t gotten rid of his SQUIP, and the thought of how Jeremy was nearing that path had terrified him.

But now things are getting better for everyone and that’s all that matters.

When the vehicle swerved a bit away from its lane for the third time before returning back to where it’s supposed to be, Michael shakes his head and pats Rich’s arm.

“Okay, that’s it. Pull over. Let me drive for a while.”

“I’m fiiine.” Rich stubbornly swats his hand away.

“Dude, I would prefer to get home with all of my limbs still perfectly attached to my body. So unless you want to be strapped in the hospital _again_ , you gotta let me drive.”

“How do I know you just want to get behind this baby?”

“What?” Michael stares at him for a second or two, dumbfounded. But then he realizes that Rich is referring to his car and he rolls his eyes. “Please, don’t get all cocky with me. I’m getting a new car before graduation.”

“You should get something that’s big enough for you to have sex in.”

“Dude, focus. Let me drive.”

Rich lets out a long whiny groan that eventually fades into something that sounds… a tad bit erotic. _Wait, fuck, no._ The last thing he needs right now is seeing someone who had tormented him before as ‘erotic’. He will _not_ find his own school bully hot, even if this said bully is now a completely changed man.

Much to his content, Rich does pull over and they switch seats.

As soon as Michael started the engine, he gives Rich a very fleeting glance to see him already on his way to passing out with his head hanging low and his arms crossed over his chest.

_Yeah, tipsy my ass._

 

# 4\. “It reminded me of you.”

“Yo, Michelangelhoe! Welcome back!” Jake claps a hand at Michael’s back, earning a startled jump from the bespectacled teen and Rich laughs before nudging his best friend as a gesture of flippant disapproval.

“You’re gonna break his spine, man.” He comments with a grin and a shake of his head. “You really don’t know your own strength.”

“Y-Yeah,” Michael turns to Jake with a small sheepish smile after pushing his locker closed. “save it for when you’re earning minimum wage by carrying supplies for McDonalds.”

Rich snickers at that and thankfully, Jake doesn’t seem to be offended by the remark. If anything, he looks pretty impressed by the other’s retort and he laughs before clapping his hand-- _solidly_ \-- against Michael’s back again. An uncharacteristically high pitched startled yelp escapes through Michael’s lips at the action and Rich stares at him in bewilderment, feeling an endeared grin tug the corners of his lips. The sound seems to have gone over Jake’s head though because he doesn’t even point it out which he would if he did considering that he’ll find every opportunity to make fun of someone in good, friendly humor. Michael still appears to be thoroughly embarrassed by the sound though as he fixes his glasses and clears his throat.

“Anywaaaay, nice to see you butt-buddies again but I gotta go and meet up with Jeremy and Christine so see ya.” With a sharp turn, Michael walks away in quick strides.

“Wha-- no souvenirs from the Philippines?” Jake calls out to him with a genuinely disappointed frown.

“It’s good to keep dreaming!” Michael shouts back before making a turn to another hallway and completely leaving their line of sight.

* * *

“Hey, Rich.”

Rich glances to his side to find Michael leaning back against the locker next to his, pulling his headphones down from his ears and letting them hang over his neck. Rich arches a skeptic brow at his stance, noticing the slight twitching of the taller male’s fingers in spite of how he’s obviously trying to keep a cool composure. What, is he on drugs now? Because if he is, then the blond is going to need to have a serious talk with Jeremy because he’s been there before and he does _not_ want to see Michael going down that lane.

After grabbing a pillow from his locker, shoving it into his empty backpack, then pushing his locker shut, he switches his gaze back at Michael. “What’s up, man?”

Michael scratches his neck. “Erm, well… uh, where’s Jake?”

Rich blinks. “He left early with Chloe. Why?”

Michael fiddles with the wire of his headphones, shrugging his shoulders. “Nothing, just asking.”

Okay, now _that_ is weird. Michael doesn’t care enough about Jake to ask about his whereabouts-- or at least that’s how Rich sees it. Unless…

“You’ve got a crush on him or somethin’?” He asks as he slings one strap of his backpack over his shoulder, trying to make his tone come off as naturally casual as possible despite that weird sense of… _something negative_ clawing up inside his chest.

Michael sputters and looks at him, cow-eyed. “What-- no! Dude!”

Rich isn’t convinced. “Then what’s up with you? You’re acting all… Jeremy-ish.”

And just like that, a small humored smile graces Michael’s lips and Rich feels his heart drop to his stomach by the mere sight of it. Michael shakes his head and shrugs his shoulders, his eyes still focused on the way he’s fiddling with the wire of his headphones. “I just… don’t know how to do this without making it weird, you know?”

“No, I don’t know.” Rich tilts his head slightly to the side, curious. “What’re you talking about, man?”

Silence descends over the two of them as Michael stares down at the floor, seeming to have some kind of internal debate, but Rich tries to be patient and waits. The guy is clearly nervous about something and somehow believes that _he_ is the person to talk to about whatever situation he must have gotten himself in. Of course, there’s no doubt that Rich is flattered that Michael sees him as someone worthy enough to confide to-- especially when not many people in school take him seriously.

Now that he’s thought about it, Michael is literally the only one who does take him seriously when he needs to. Sure, Jake has those moments as well but not as often as Rich prefers. Jake isn’t exactly the most ideal person to go to in times of emotional need considering the fact that his constant solution to every problem is getting shitfaced as much as possible.

“Ugh, screw it.” Rich picks up on Michael’s irritated tone and he sees him fishing something out of his pocket then pushing it to his direction. Rich blinks owlishly at what appears to be a cute keychain of a Golden Retriever hanging between Michael’s fingertips. He blinks again and diverts his gaze at the other male, finding him still avoiding eye contact but the dark hue of red flushing from his neck and up to his ears doesn’t go unnoticed.

Assuming he’s meant to take it, Rich reaches for the keychain and takes it in his hand. His eyes flicker from the trinket-- which turns out to have a print of a small flag of the Philippines on the back-- then back to Michael. “A… Golden Retriever?”

Michael rubs the back of his neck and looks off to the side, completely shrouding his expression from Rich’s view. “It reminded me of you.”

And just like that, Rich feels a sudden rush of heat creep up his face as he looks back down at the gift he had just apparently accepted. The simple fact that Michael thought of him even when he was out of the country during Christmas break does strange whimsical flips in his stomach and he tries his very best not to grin too much at that. Maybe _this_ is why Michael was asking about Jake’s whereabouts-- just to make sure that the overachieving jock wouldn’t be around to poke fun at them for ‘being gay’ even though he gave Rich a few pairs of boxers for Christmas. It’s alarming how he even got his waistline so accurately.

Shit, how is he supposed to react to this? The urge to hug this lovable nerd is so damn hard to resist but he knows better than to do that in public. Especially since they’re not _that_ particularly close… yet. Rich intends on changing that soon.

Deciding to get rid of the awkward tension in the air, he grins and slings his arm over Michael’s shoulders which causes the taller male to bend down a bit. Rich then pinches his cheek. “Aww, _Michelle_! Did you miss me that much?”

“Duuuude, can it!” Michael immediately pushes his hand away from his cheek, his face beet red and his smile somewhat sheepish but proud. “I was _this close_ to buying the chihuahua instead, you know.”

“You literally just told me yesterday that five foot five is considered the average height for men in the Philippines.”

“That only applies to Filipinos.”

“Either way, you were thinking of meeee.” Rich teases, not even bothered by the jab at his height. He’s heard far worse and Michael’s supposed insult lacks the venom it should have when one tries to slander the other.

“God, you’re really making this weird.” Michael tries to pull away but Rich just tugs him back.

“Does this mean I’ve finally managed to achieve Rank 5 in your social link?”

Michael suddenly stops trying to brush him away and stares at him in awe. “Wow. I can’t believe you just said all that without a single error in your reference.”

Is that really something to be impressed about, Rich wonders. It’s not that big of a deal to him after all since Michael wouldn’t exactly shut up about his current video game obsessions. He shrugs anyway. “It’s not like I tune you out whenever you talk about those video games you play.”

“I kinda assumed you do though since you don’t exactly play video games.”

“I play sometimes. I have an Xbox. But yeah, you’re one hell of a good storyteller. Shit, you’re like the Jenna Rolan of video games.”

“Except I tell you actual facts that don’t eradicate a person’s entire existence.”

“Point taken.”

They share a laugh at that until their conversation is cut short by Jeremy calling Michael over. With the awkward tension finally long gone, Michael bids farewell for the day and Rich smiles and nods before watching him head over to Jeremy who acknowledges him with a wave. Of course, still trying to maintain a reputation, Rich just gives him a nod of acknowledgment and a smirk before walking to the opposite direction of the hallway.

He looks back down at the keychain in his hand and right away, those giddy feelings in his stomach begin to flutter again.

_Damn._

 

# 5\. “No, no, it’s my treat.”

“You know, I’m not surprised that a 50’s themed diner would be this expensive. Everyone has been so obsessed with this kind of aesthetic nowadays, including myself. It only makes sense that some have thought of profiting off of it.” Michael comments as his eyes rake over the available items printed on the menu handed to him by a redheaded roller-skating waitress. He peeks over at Rich who is seated across from him, seemingly focused on what to order. His brows are knitted together in intense concentration and his lips move with every word he reads. Michael couldn’t help the endeared smile creeping up his lips and regrets forgetting his phone back at home because the sight is so hilariously picture perfect. He’s never seen anyone so profoundly fixated on what to order in a restaurant.

As though only noticing the stare that has been lingering on him, Rich looks up and Michael quickly diverts his eyes back down at the menu. The taller teen mentally curses himself for acting like a peeping stalker and immediately clears his throat in an attempt to avert his companion’s possible suspicion over whether or not he actually caught him staring.

“When do you think the others will get here?” He asks, looking out at the window and praying to the heavens above that he will catch a glimpse of Jeremy and Christine. Unfortunately, nobody familiar comes into sight.

“Oh, Jake and Chloe couldn’t make it.”

Michael looks back at him in surprise but Rich has already resumed staring at his own menu, though the endearingly concentrated look on his lightly freckled face from earlier is no longer there.

“They canceled on us?”

“Yeah, last minute.” Rich laughs and it sounds questionably forced. “Typical Jake, am I right?”

Michael arches a skeptic brow at that. “What about Jeremy and Christine? I was just talking to Jeremy this morning and he said he’ll be able to make it.”

“Oh right, those two…” He hears the blond mutter and this just further piques his suspicion. Rich does a bad job of pretending to be more invested in the menu as he flips a page. “I just called Christine and she said they couldn’t make it either. She said something about practicing their lines, I think? Typical Christine, am I right?”

If there’s one thing Michael isn’t fond of doing, it’s jumping to conclusions. He really, _really_ doesn’t want to come off as arrogant but somehow… he has this slight suspicion that Rich didn’t invite Jake nor Chloe at all. Jeremy was also acting strange earlier when he reminded him about their plans on trying out the new diner that just opened up near the school, and Jeremy has _never_ been a good liar. But Michael gave him the benefit of the doubt anyway which he obviously shouldn’t have.

But again, he shouldn’t jump to conclusions.

“Oh.” He eventually says. “That’s too bad. So I guess it’s just the two of us, huh?”

“Just the two of us, yep.” Rich stiffly nods his head

 _Huh_.

Michael gazes back down at the menu and begins to analyze the ridiculous prices of the dishes. He frowns at the sight before putting the menu down and reaching for his wallet. From the corner of his sight, he finds Rich putting his menu down as well and watching him.

“What are you doing?” The blond asks.

“Just checking how much money I have right now. I forgot to--”

“No, no, it’s my treat.”

Michael stops for a beat then stares back up at Rich, the undeniable suspicion within him growing with every passing second. _Don’t jump to conclusions,_ he mentally tells himself. _Don’t you fucking jump to conclusions._

But shit, he’s still jumping to conclusions.

It was Rich’s idea to give this diner a try. He’s the one who reserved a booth for them. And _for some reason,_ all of their friends suddenly canceled on them last minute. And now _he’s_ paying for both of their meals? Isn’t it normal to assume the only thing that is obviously spiraling out of this situation?

Aside from that, Michael recalls Christine telling him about how Jake did the exact same thing to her before she started dating Jeremy.

Could this be Jake’s idea then?

Now Rich looks uncomfortable as he shifts on his seat. “W-What are you staring at?”

“A big dork.” The words slip past Michael’s lips before he could even reconsider it.

Rich frowns. “I am not.”

“No, you’re right.” Now Michael couldn’t help but grin. “You’re a small dork.”

“We short people actually prefer to be called alluring garden gnomes, thanks.”

Michael cracks up at that before picking his menu up and reaching over to tap it over Rich’s head, still grinning from ear to ear as he tries to ease down the woozy feeling of delight churning in his stomach. Rich has a small, embarrassed smile on his face as he swats the menu away, his cheeks noticeably red. There really is no mistaking his assumption.

“You big idiot.” Michael clicks his tongue. “You do know you could have just asked me out on a date, right?”

“H-Huh?” Now Rich’s face looks completely flushed. “You… I… Was I that obvious?”

“Nope, I’m just really, really, _really_ smart.” Michael taps his temple with a smug smirk but there’s no doubt that he’s getting ridiculously giddy over this. Yes, he knows there’s this some kind of will-they-won’t-they tension between the two of them ever since Rich was finally out of the hospital and while that kind of connection was undeniably fun, it was also damn frustrating. Michael has never really asked anyone out on a date nor has he ever even been on one so the thought of asking Rich out was just way out of his comfort zone. The best he could do was wait.

And wait.

And wait.

The wait was agonizingly long but it is so worth it.

“Ugh, sorry.” Rich slaps his hand over his eyes in apparent humiliation and leans back against his seat. “This is like so shitty of me… tricking you into dating me--”

“It is an asshole move, yeah.” Michael is quick to agree but when he sees Rich peeking at him between his fingers, he couldn’t help but smile anyway. “But hey, it works for me so it’s all good. Just try to be more upfront about stuff next time, you know?”

Rich still looks pretty embarrassed but he manages to finally move his hand away and sits upright. “Well… okay. Can I be upfront now?”

“Go ahead.” Michael nods.

“I saved up a lot from my part-time shifts at Happy Petals but I don’t think it’s enough to cover both of us in a place like this.”

Michael laughs again. “Yeah, that’s what I figured. Food court then?”

Finally, Rich returns his smile and nods. “Food court.”

 

# 6\. “Come here. Let me fix it.”

“You… walked into a wall…”

Rich fumbles with his fingers and squirms on his seat, knowing that he doesn’t even have to look to know that Michael clearly isn’t buying his excuse. Nevertheless, he’s going to stand by it because the last thing he needs right now is someone looking at him with sympathy. He gets enough of that from the neighbors after all, he doesn’t need another one from the guy he’s dating.

“Yeah. I was just…” He waves his hand in the air as his mind searches for the word. “...sleep-deprived…?” It’s not a lie, technically. He really hasn’t been getting enough sleep these days. In fact, sleep is such a rarity now ever since his SQUIP finally left him alone. It would have been easy to believe that without that thing controlling him like a puppet, he would finally have a simpler life being himself and not giving a fuck what others think.

But apparently, it’s not that easy.

Because his SQUIP is _still_ in there. Whispering to him. Still trying to control him.

He can tolerate it during the day because thanks to Jeremy, he knows that he’ll just have to make his own voice louder than hers. But in the middle of the night? Now that just requires a whole fuck ton of energy. If he’s not busy getting yelled at or beaten up by his own dad, his SQUIP would be in his brain telling him what he should and shouldn’t do. Recently, she’s been whispering about the probabilities of Michael leaving him for someone better. He knows SQUIPs can see into the possible outcomes of the future, but he can’t tell if this is just her way of manipulating him into leaving Michael and continue climbing the social ladder they both have worked so hard to achieve, or that she really can see Michael dumping him someday.

“Found it.” Michael’s voice yanks him out of his reverie and he looks up to see him straightening up from the bottom cabinet he has been going through and walking over to kneel in front of him, a bottle of Hydrogen Peroxide in one hand and a small bag of cotton balls in the other.

Rich is thankful that the school nurse isn’t around at the moment because unlike Michael, she would have continued poking until she gets the actual story.

“Come here. Let me fix it.” Michael gently tugs on Rich’s tank top and Rich is quick to lean in from his chair and let him cautiously dab the solution-soaked cotton onto the deep tearing of his skin marked on the bridge of his nose. He winces at the sudden biting sting and Michael stops for a second before gently dabbing it again. Rich closes his eyes and inhales through his nose in an attempt to fight back another wince, finding comfort from the warm touch of Michael’s fingers against his jaw.

“I know you know that I think your story is bullshit.” Michael breaks the silence as he directs his focus on another cut above Rich’s brow. “Because walking into a wall wouldn’t really result to having several cuts and bruises on your face. You get two at most.”

Rich opens his eyes and looks at Michael, only realizing the close proximity between them. “I know.” He mutters in defeat, his eyes subconsciously glancing at the other male’s lips.

_So close._

“But I’m not gonna force you to tell me.” Michael goes on, seemingly unaware. “Does your dad know about this? Pastors who have kids are usually over-protective, aren’t they?”

“He’s not a pastor anymore.” Rich mutters.

“Oh. Well, you should know that I’m always here if you’re ready to tell me anything.”

“Thanks.” Rich only mutters for the second time, his eyes still fixated on Michael’s lips. They’ve been dating for two weeks and a half now but somehow, they still haven’t kissed yet. They don’t even bring it up which should be weird, right? He went out with so many girls who he could freely kiss anytime he wanted when he was dating them but when it comes to Michael, it somehow… doesn’t feel right.

He just couldn’t find the right timing. The setting and the mood have to be perfect. This is the first time he’s dating someone who he actually sees as an important part of his future. Fuck, that sounds so damn sappy of him.

“There.” Michael says once he’s done treating his wounds, a small victorious smile played across his lips. But as soon as his eyes meet Rich’s, Rich quickly averts his gaze down-- embarrassed that he has been caught staring. It’s hard to tell what Michael is thinking due to the fact he grew quiet right after that, but the taller teen makes no move in standing up and reminding him that they still have a class to attend.

Before Rich could choose whether or not to look back at him, he suddenly feels the other’s fingers moving from his jaw and up to the back of his neck before he’s being slowly pulled down to press their lips together. It doesn’t even linger long because Michael is quick to break it before the blond could even have a proper reaction.

Rich stares back at him in awe, feeling his face heat up at the unexpected contact. Michael, on the other hand, looks a bit embarrassed but still stern as he gives the shorter male a pat on the cheek.

“Promise me you won’t walk into walls anymore?” He asks, his tone tight with obvious self-consciousness.

Rich blinks for a second or two before finally grinning and leaning in to give Michael another peck on the lips, earning a surprised flinch from the other.

“Promise.”

 

# 7\. “I’ll walk you home.”

“Shit, what a piece of junk.” Michael gives up as he straightens up and gives the tire a frustrated kick. He’s been saving up for a new car but he still has a long way to go before he could even afford a decent second-hand one. He sighs and shoves his hands into the pockets of his jacket, turning around and leaning back against his busted vehicle as he waits for Rich to step out of the convenience store with his promised slushie. His day has been bad enough as it is and somehow, his own car deems it not bad enough that it has to freaking break down on the same day Rich had to leave his own car at the repair shop.

At least his house is close by.

But he’s still not entirely sure where Rich lives since he was supposed to show him the way.

Speaking of, the blond finally makes an entrance and much to Michael’s content, he has a tall cup of blueberry slushie in his hand. This guy really is the only highlight in this shitty of a day.

“What happened?” Rich asks as he hands him his beverage.

Michael takes a greedy sip of his drink before stepping away from his car and gesturing to it rather theatrically. “In the great words of Emo Philips, _‘I used to pray every night for a bicycle. Then I realized, the Lord in His wisdom doesn't work that way. So I just stole one and asked Him to forgive me… and I got it!’_ Sadly, God was not as forgiving as I thought so He came to bite me in the ass.”

“Damn, God’s a freak.” Rich snickers, inspecting the car. “Wait, you _stole_ this car?”

“Sorta… Not really.” Michael shrugs. “More like I borrowed it from a relative and that relative kinda died the next day.”

“Erm... _‘_ **_kinda_ ** _died’_?”

“Her family never really asked for the car back. I waited it out for a bit in their time of mourning but then they moved out of the country so now it’s mine for the taking. But yeah, sorry about this.”

“Oh… That’s fine, man. I can just walk home--”

“I’ll walk you home.”

“You don’t have to--”

“I should! I promised that I’ll drive you home after all.”

“Yeah, but it’s not like you asked for your car to break down.”

“I know but still.” Michael gives the tire another kick as if doing so will miraculously bring his car back to life. Unfortunately, God still has no intention of forgiving him so he should might as well let this be. “I haven’t seen your house yet, you know. It’d be cool to actually see what kind of home my boyfriend lives in.”

Silence follows his words which is rather strange because Michael figured that Rich will stubbornly insist that he will walk home alone. Curious, he casts his gaze on the shorter teen only to find him grinning at him from ear to ear. Did he say something funny?

“Boyfriend, huh?” Rich wiggles his shoulders teasingly.

And it hits him.

He just referred to Rich as his _fucking boyfriend._ They have never exactly talked about labels yet but shit, aren’t they doing stuff that boyfriends usually do anyway? Maybe they haven’t done anything in the bedroom department yet but they do go out on dates and steal private kisses whenever they can so that has to count for something, right? Still, this is _not_ how he envisioned it to go. He had always thought Rich will be the first one to bring it up because he’s normally so enthusiastic about all that romantic sappy shit-- not that Michael is complaining though. He likes that side of him.

But it doesn’t change the fact how embarrassed he is right now for bringing up the word ‘boyfriend’ first.

He tries to play it off with a wave of his hand, turning his head away from Rich in an attempt to hide his warm face as though he has all his insecurities written all over it. He must be looking even more socially incompetent now with his lack of familiarity on a proper reaction.  

“It’s not a big deal.” He sputters before sipping on his drink to come off as casual as possible. “Let’s just-- whoa.”

His sentence is immediately cut short when he feels Rich’s fingers enclosing around his free hand and tugging him around to face him. He is met with the other male’s handsome grinning face and Michael could have sworn his heart had stopped right then and there.

“It _is_ a big deal!” Rich points out, enthusiastic. “I’ve been waiting so long for you to refer to me as your boyfriend. I was beginning to think that title is exclusive to Jeremy… which would have been my fault ‘cause I couldn’t stop calling you two ‘boyfriends’ back then.”

“D-Don’t be stupid. And why would you even be waiting?” Michael cocks a brow at him, still nervous. “Why couldn’t _you_ just call _me_ your boyfriend first?”

“Because you told me you’ve never dated anyone but me!” Rich laughs perhaps a bit too giddily for a man of his build. “I didn’t want to rush things. I mean, I’m pretty chill with doing things at your own pace.”

Michael ponders about that. “So… if I were to tell you that we should totally have sex in my bedroom right now, you’d do it?”

“Hell yeah!”

“Idiot.” Michael flicks his forehead and Rich quickly takes a step back from the supposedly painful impact.

“Ow!” He rubs his forehead, a pout gracing his lips though Michael could tell he didn’t mean to show that. “What was that for?”

“I’m not your SQUIP, man.” Michael points out after taking another casual sip of his drink. “While I do appreciate how much of a ‘gentleman’ you’re being, you gotta tell me if there’s stuff you want to do with me instead of waiting for me to initiate it. We gotta _communicate_ about this kind of shit. You can’t just wait for me to tell you what to do.”

“Okay, why am I getting relationship advice from a virgin?”

Michael narrows his eyes at him. “You’re on thin ice, pal.”

Rich visibly flinches at that before quickly rushing back to him and pulling him in by hooking his fingers into the loops of the bespectacled male’s jeans, not seeming to be bothered by the fact that Michael is somewhat towering over him. “Sorry, old habits die hard. It’s not like I’m making fun of you for being a virgin.” And with that, he gives Michael a quick kiss on the lips. “As long as _I_ get to take your virginity eventually, I’m perfectly fine with dating a virgin.”

Michael rolls his eyes but he couldn’t stop the entertained smile creeping up his lips. “And what makes you think I intend on having my first with you?”

Genuine horror and betrayal dawn in on Rich’s face. “Is there someone else?”

Michael shrugs and feigns a look of interest in swirling his slushie. “I dunno, Coach Sweeney has been climbing my hottie list these days.”

Rich cringes. “Our football coach who brings his kid with him every practice? Isn't that a daddy kink? Gross.”

“That’s funny coming from someone who has a foot kink.”

“Pantyhose kink!” Rich is immediately on the defensive. “Feet don’t turn me on unless they’re in a pair of pantyhose.”

Now it’s Michael’s turn to cringe. “Freak.”

“Nerd.”

“Dork.”

“Dweeb.”

“Ignoramus.”

Silence looms over them again before they both crack their own smiles and laugh at the silly direction their conversation has taken. Michael has completely forgotten about the embarrassment he was just drowning in mere minutes ago and it’s all thanks to this blond oaf who always knows how to get rid of his anxiety. He sighs as he presses his forehead against Rich’s and closes his eyes, his free hand coming up to rest it behind the blond’s neck.

“You really are the highlight of my day.” He says, finding Rich’s close presence comforting.

He feels Rich move against him to kiss his lips again and this time, the contact lingers. His lips are so reassuringly warm against his that it’s easy for him to lose himself in them. Rich tugs him closer by the loops of his jeans until there is no stretch of space between them. Their hips press up against each other and just as he feels Rich’s tongue about to part his lips open, a loud obnoxious hoot erupts nearby.

“Get a room you two!”

Michael is the first to snap away from Rich, his face completely beet red and his heart racing painfully as he turns to find Brooke and Chloe pulling their car over and smiling at them.

“Hey girls.” Rich greets them anyway after clearing his throat.

“Hey,” Chloe gives them a wink. “I wanted to watch you two swap salivas out here but Brooke can be such a prude so yeah, sorry for the interruption.”

“I’m not a prude!” Brooke pouts. “I just wanted them to know we caught them in the act.”

“Everyone knows they’re dating, Brooke.”

“Yeah, but I meant you don’t ever really see them _together-together_ in school!”

Michael shares a look of slight surprise and realization with Rich before they quickly look away again.

“T-That’s just because I’m always with Jeremy and he’s always with Jake.” Michael decides to point out then takes another sip from his drink to hopefully cool down his face. It didn’t work, sadly.

“Polyamory?” Chloe concludes with a gleam of devilry in her eyes.

“No!” Michael protests. “Not like _that_.”

“And aren’t you dating Jake?” Rich asks Chloe in disbelief.

Chloe just rolls her eyes. “No, we’re done.”

“I’d give them three days.” Brooke butts in.

“Brooke!”

“I-I mean a day.”

“That’s not what I--”

“I should get home now.” Rich suddenly cuts them off after glancing down at his watch. “It’s getting dark and my dad’s probably getting worried about me.”

“I’ll walk you home.” Michael offers again but Rich quickly shakes his head.

“No, _really_. You don’t have to.”

Michael clamps his mouth shut at the weight of Rich’s tone. He’s really persistent about not letting him walk him home at all and as much as Michael is dying to know why, he knows better than to pry. Like he said before, he’s willing to wait and will always be available whenever Rich feels like confiding to someone. Unfortunately, the guy still hasn’t done much confiding yet and he could only hope it will happen soon. It’s hard not knowing what’s going on with his boyfriend’s deeper personal life.

_Boyfriend._

He shakes the word out of his mind.

“Why, what’s wrong with your shitty car?” Chloe’s question pulls him out of his pondering and Michael looks back at his vehicle before shrugging his shoulders and redirecting his eyes on the girls.

“It’s dead now.”

“That’s too bad.” Brooke doesn’t sound very sympathetic but Michael couldn’t bring himself to care. “Want us to give you guys a ride home then? Rich, you live a bit far from here, right?”

Michael blinks. How did she know that?

He looks at Rich in hopes of hearing an explanation but much to his surprise, Rich refuses to meet his eyes. What in the actual fuck?

“Uh, yeah.” Rich nods a bit hesitantly. “Michael and I need a ride so sure. He lives just a few blocks from here so…” Finally, he turns to look at Michael and visibly swallows. “...want a ride with them?”

Michael hesitates. What’s with this guy and why is he acting so… guilty?

He eventually shakes his head. “Nah, I’ll just walk home. It’s about time I do my annual cardio anyway.”

The girls chuckle at that while Rich, on the other hand, just smiles apologetically at him. “I’ll call you when I get home, yeah?”

Michael tries to bury the skulking suspicion back into the deepest depths of his mind. Maybe Rich intends on explaining tonight on the phone. It’s better to give him the benefit of the doubt instead of arguing over what could be deemed as petty after all. Michael then finally gives him a smile and nods. “Yeah, okay.”

 

# 8\. “Have a good day at work.”

“Michael’s upstairs.”

“Thanks, Mrs. Mell.”

“Do you boys want anything? I’ve been practicing on making the perfect bibingka and I’m proud to say, I’ve been doing it pretty well. Hopefully, I’ll be able to master it by Christmas.”

“Ooh, that sounds tempting.”

“Great! You go on upstairs and I’ll bring you boys a plate. And while you’re at it, can you please tell my son to put some pants on for once?”

“Oh, uh, sure.”

“Thank you, honey. Now go on ahead.”

He doesn’t really know what the hell a bibingka is but Rich has gotten a taste of Mrs. Mell’s ube cake back then so he has no doubt that whatever dish she’ll make him try will be just as good. As he climbs up the stairs and heads for Michael’s room, he hears the music of Bob Marley’s Buffalo Soldier blasting through from the other side of the door. An image of Michael dancing by himself in his room to the tunes of his favorite singer flashes in his mind and he grins eagerly at the possibility of walking into his boyfriend doing as such. Without the bother of knocking at the door, Rich twists the knob and pushes it open ever so carefully to sneakily take a peek inside.

He finds a few used clothes, an empty bag of Jalapeño-flavored Cheetos, and several empty cans of Dr. Pepper scattered around the carpeted floor. He couldn’t even push the door any further open because there appears to be something behind it that’s obstructing him from doing so. But it’s not the unsightly parade of trash that caught his point of interest though-- it’s the proud young man swinging his hips and pointing his fingers to the air in the midst of the catastrophe, only clad in his red boxer shorts.

Rich’s grin grows wider and takes in the view. He’s never exactly seen Michael without his shirt on before and while the guy’s body may be leaning on the soft side (when Rich usually prefers the slightly beefy ones), he definitely likes what he sees.

 _“I'm just a Buffalo Soldier. In the heart of America. Stolen from Africa, brought to America.”_ Michael sings along, still completely unaware of Rich’s presence.

Rich bites his lip as he squeezes himself into the room, excited to catch the Bob Marley fanatic by surprise. After closing the door behind him and leaning his back against it, he crosses his arms and watches Michael just a bit more before finally speaking up.

“Nice ass, Michael.”

Michael suddenly puts a stop to his dancing and turns around. Surprisingly enough, he doesn’t seem to be that embarrassed to be caught dancing in his underwear. He does feign an appalled look though and brings his arms up to cross them over his chest.

 _“Ay, iskandalo!”_ He says in a high-pitched scandalized voice and Rich laughs.

“God, you are such a dweeb.”

Michael laughs him off before walking over to his record player and turning the volume down. “What brings you to my humble abode?”

Rich shrugs, not moving from his spot. “Just wanted to see my boyfriend in his uniform before he goes off to his first part-time job. I want to have the chance to say, _‘have a good day at work!’_ like a proud husband.”

“Please, you’re just here for my mom’s ube cake.”

“Apparently she made bibingka today.”

“Oh yeah, I’m sick of that. She keeps giving me a slice every single day.”

“Yikes. She’s gonna give us each a slice though.”

“Yeah well, she doesn’t know I’m sick of it so don’t tell her.”

“I won’t if you put some pants on. Aren’t you going to be late?”

Michael glances at his clock but then nonchalantly shrugs his shoulders. “I still have half an hour.” He then bends down to pick up the empty cans of soda scattered about, clearly unsuspecting of the way he’s giving Rich an eyeful of his perfectly cute tush. Rich fails to resist himself as he walks over and gives his ass a teasing pinch which in turn elicits a jolt then a half-hearted glare from the other.

Rich laughs anyway. “What did you want me to do? Just… stand there and stare?”

“Helping me clean up my room would suffice.”

“Nah, man. This ain’t my mess to fix.”

 _“Boys? Are you two...”_ Mrs. Mell’s voice rings in from the other side of the door, pausing for a beat. “... _decent?_ ”

And apparently, that’s enough to embarrass Michael. “Mom!” Horrified, he pushes past Rich, who couldn’t stop himself from howling with laughter, and opens the door-- knocking down the tall stack of VHS tapes behind it.

Rich turns to find Mrs. Mell standing there with a plate of what appears to be some kind of yellow rice cake in her hands. But when her eyes catch sight of her own son, a frown of disapproval crosses her features. “Michael! I told you to at least wear pants in the house, especially when we have a visitor!”

“I didn’t know Rich was coming over…!” Michael defends himself.

“Whether we have a visitor or not, you need to have your pants on. What if our house was set on fire and we all have to run outside to get away from it? Are you perfectly fine with being seen in your little tighty-whities?”`

“M-Mom, these aren’t tighty-whities! I’m past that now!”

Mrs. Mell rolls her eyes then looks past over Michael’s shoulder to smile at Rich. “Please excuse my son. He can be a bit of a child.”

“No problem, Mrs. Mell.” Rich gives her a casual salute. “I’ll straighten him up for ya.”

“Really? A gay joke?” Michael gives him a look of disbelief.

Mrs. Mell giggles at that then hands the plate to her son. “You boys better behave now. And Michael, I expect you to be downstairs in your uniform twenty minutes before your shift, understand? Your cousin got you this job and you can’t ruin her good name by being late on your first day.”

“Yeah, okay, ma.”

“Good. Now give mommy a kiss.”

Michael doesn’t hesitate at all when he bends down to give his mom a kiss on the cheek and Rich only realizes now how short Mrs. Mell is. She must be standing at four foot eight at most compared to her son who’s five foot seven and most likely still growing. As soon as Michael closes the door and sets the plate on his bed, Rich remains awkwardly on his spot-- wondering what it must be like to have a mother who he can lovingly bicker with. Michael clearly has a close bond with his parents judging by how fun their dinners are every time they invited Rich over.

“Dude, you okay?”

Rich yanks himself out of his thoughts and finds Michael already putting a shirt on before sitting on his bed to slice a piece of bibingka with a fork.

“Oh, uh, yeah. I’m cool.” He moves to sit on the floor beside the bed, reaching for his own fork to try the homemade dish out.

“You sure? Was it the ‘house on fire’ thing that my mom said? She sometimes forgets to think before she speaks.”

Rich shakes his head and smiles. “No, I’m fine. I just realized that I really like your parents.”

Michael looks at him in humored disbelief and chuckles. “Oh trust me, they’re way quirkier than they let on. Did you know I woke up this morning and found two condoms, a bottle of lube, and pamphlets on safe homosexual sex lying just right outside my door?”

“No way.” Rich laughs. “You’re messing with me!”

“It’s true!” Michael laughs along. “I was so fucking mortified, man. I just wish Micah didn’t see any of that shit. Not exactly a conversation I want to have with a six-year-old.”

“Your brother will just probably think the condoms are candies.” Rich waves his fork in the air after plopping a piece of bibingka into his mouth.

“I hope not because then he will never stop begging me to give him one.”

Rich laughs again. “Damn, your parents are…” He stops and realizes the context as to why Michael’s parents even did that in the first place. “Wait, we haven’t exactly done anything yet so why are they--”

“They want me to be prepared, I guess.” Michael quickly cuts him off as though embarrassed by the question. “I confronted them about it earlier and told them we’re not doing anything. But then my mom said that the time will come eventually and she just doesn’t want me... getting hurt.”

“Getting…” Rich pauses to think. “...hurt?”

When Michael refuses to elaborate, it dawns on him and Rich laughs again-- _louder_ this time. “Oh shit! Did your parents just automatically assume you’re gonna be _the bottom?”_

“Shuddup!” Michael throws a pillow at him but Rich is quick to block it with his arm as he continues to laugh his ass off.

“Holy shit! I can’t believe this! I mean, I _can_ believe this but it’s still so damn funny! Oh my god, I can’t breathe! This is priceless!”

“You can laugh all you want because when we do have sex, there’s no way I’m gonna be the bottom.”

This puts an abrupt pause to Rich’s laughter and he looks at Michael, mouth agape with absolute shock. “What do you mean you’re not gonna be the bottom?”

“I’m not lending you my ass, Goranski.”

“Why not?! Babe! I thought your cute ass is mine for the taking!”

“Did you just call me ‘babe’? You really need to hear yourself when you talk, man.”

“Michaaaaaeeeel…” Rich whines, knowing that he probably sounds like a needy child but who could blame him? He’s been looking forward to the day when Michael will finally give him the green light and all this time, he’s been envisioning himself screwing him senseless. Of course, he’ll be gentle the first time but who knows how rough Michael will eventually want him to be once he gets the hang of it? He reaches out to tug on Michael’s shirt but Michael just swats his hand away.

 _“Control yourself, heathen.”_ The taller teen says in a deeper voice, probably referencing a fictional character that Rich definitely knows nothing about.

Rich pouts at him. “Do you ever even picture the two of us doing it?”

“Why, do you?”

“All the time!”

“You really have no tact, huh?”

“I’m serious!” Rich moves up to the bed hastily, careful not to topple the plate over as he meets his boyfriend’s eyes. “I always imagine what it would be like but I want to know if you do as well. I don’t want this to be a one-sided thing, you know?”

Michael stares at him for a second or two-- clearly flustered-- before clearing his throat and directing his eyes down at their food, picking at it with his fork. “Well… I dunno. I mean, yeah… sometimes. I do think about it.”

“And what’s it like?”

“Please, I don’t want to go into details.”

“Okay okay, where do you see yourself as then? Top or bottom?”

“I--” Michael sighs and scratches his head as though searching for the right words. “I just-- I guess-- maybe-- argh, I don’t know what to say, man! This is so weird to talk about!”

“Nu-uh!” Rich stubbornly shakes his head. “It’s just sex! I’m pretty sure you talk about that a lot with Jeremy.”

“Yeah because he’s my best buddy!”

“Well, it’s weirder that you don’t talk about it with your boyfriend!”

“Okay fine!” Michael brings his hands up in surrender. “I see myself either being the bottom or the top. It really depends on what I’m in the mood for. Happy?”

Rich finally slumps a bit on the bed and just stares at Michael, stumped. That kinda makes sense though. They can be versatile-- that could work. Still, the thought of being the bottom is undoubtedly… scary. He’s never exactly imagined himself in that position at all so hopefully, Michael will be the _constant_ bottom instead. There will be times where Rich will give in as well but only if Michael really wants him to.

 _“In the mood for?”_ He quotes his handsome bespectacled nerd. “Does that mean you touch yourse--”

Michael immediately shoves a large piece of bibingka into his mouth to shut him up and Rich nearly falls back on the bed. He chews it anyway, wiping the dust of sugar away from his lips with his thumb. “That’s kinky.” He says in between chews and Michael just sticks his tongue out at him before standing up from the bed and heading over to his closet. He pulls out a loose brown sweater and a green apron and lays it down far from their food.

“Since you now have thoroughly annoyed me, you have lost your shirtless Michael privileges. Now get out of my room so I can change.”

“Oh come on! Shirtless Michael is the best!” Rich whines for the second time but Michael manages to pull him off the bed. “Okay okay, can I at least stay downstairs so I can tell you to have a good day at work?”

“Okay, sure, whatever.” And with that, Michael pushes him out of his room.

 

# 9\. “I’ll wait.”

“Um… what are you doing here?” Michael asks even though he already knows the answer to the question. He already saw Rich the second he stepped into Steamin’ Mugs Café and as much as he appreciates having him around, he knows it’s not the best idea because he always finds himself getting distracted by him. How will he be able to work properly when his boyfriend is nearby being his usual adorable self?

Oh man, is he seriously just worrying about Rich being a huge attractive distraction to him?

That’s not something he had ever envisioned himself getting concerned about. He’s just lucky that the place isn’t brimming with customers right now which is rather odd but he’s not complaining.

So far, he’s been doing quite well at work. He had already counted on screwing up on the very first day but strangely enough, he hasn’t stumbled on his words when interacting with customers nor has he spilled any drinks _at all._ It’s a good step from rising above his social anxiety but it still doesn’t stop him from constantly repeating his scripted greetings every night before going to sleep and every morning while getting ready for school. There are even times when he would make Rich play as an immensely impatient customer just in case he ends up having to face the real deal at the café. Unfortunately, those roleplays never end with a satisfying finish because Rich couldn’t stand raising his voice at him. He never had a problem doing that before, Michael once thought, but things are different now.

“I wanted to see what you’re like in your customer service mode.” Rich flashes him a grin once he’s standing in front of him, his hair still wet from a shower he clearly took after football practice. He must have gone straight here right after.

 _“Michael, can you please refill the packets over--”_ One of his co-workers comes in with a box of packets in her arms but then she stops when she notices Rich by the counter, her eyes shamelessly staring at the burn scars on his arms. _“O-Oh, you have a customer. You can do it later.”_ Rich doesn’t look very bothered by it though-- he wouldn’t be wearing a tank top if he was. If anything, he seems to be used to such reactions. Still, Michael couldn't stop the prickle of annoyance in his skin at how his colleague lacks the act of polite subtlety.

“No, I’ll do it. No problem.” He takes the box from her just so she doesn’t come back to be a bother again. He then grants another glance at Rich. “So are you just going to get your drink and leave? Or do you plan on staying?”

“I plan on watching you work.”

“Stalker.”

“Only for you.”

“Just tell me your order or I’m calling the police.”

“But the only crime I’m guilty of is simply loving you~” Rich sings as he theatrically reaches out to him.

Michael childishly makes a face at him which Rich naturally returns and the taller teen just shakes his head in amusement before making his way towards the packets station, well-aware that the blond is trailing right behind him. Like always, they are almost out of sugar packets and he prioritizes refilling that particular section first.

“Looking cute in your uniform there, babe.” He hears Rich say in a carefully subdued voice.

“Just tell me your order, you dork.” He rolls his eyes with a smile. “And quit calling me that.”

“Fine, I’d like a piece of that fine ass--”

“I am breaking up with you if you have the audacity to finish that sentence.”

“Tsk tsk, so touchy.”

He suddenly feels Rich playing with the ties of his apron and Michael quickly slaps his hand away, a surge of laughter bubbling from his lips but then he quickly clamps his mouth shut before he could get any louder. He looks around and after realizing that they’ve garnered a few turned heads from the customers, he looks back at his boyfriend and brings his finger up to his smiling lips in hopes of indicating to him that he needs to behave.

Rich puts his hands up in surrender then zips his own lips.

Yeah, he’s definitely a distraction.

God, they probably look so cheesy together-- the kind of lame couple that he used to make fun of and snicker at privately with Jeremy. But now he could understand the sheer delight of being this silly with someone he’s come to adore so much. This must be what Jeremy felt when he first started dating Christine. The dude wouldn’t stop talking about her and while there were a lot eye-rolling moments in his stories, it somehow made Michael crave for that kind of affection and intimacy as well. He didn’t need it, but he thought that it would be a nice bonus.

And who would have thought he gets to have that with Richard Goranski?

“Hey, can I come over at your place after this?” Rich asks, reaching for a sugar packet and slipping it into the pocket of his camo pants.

“After my shift?” Michael pulls the packet out and puts it back down into its assigned compartment. “Because I still have three more hours.”

“That’s fine, I’ll wait. I can watch Youtube on my phone.”

“You sure? Don’t you have anything better to do? Like… I dunno, hang out with Jake?”

Rich shrugs. “He went out with Chloe. Turns out they’re dating again.”

“Whoa, didn't see _that one_ coming.” Michael retorts, his words dripping with sarcasm.

“Really?” His tone flies over Rich’s head. “I did. Aren’t you supposed to be like hella smart? I mean, if I see you selling your own car for gas money, I wouldn’t even question it.”

“That’s… sweet…?”

“Heh, you're welcome.” Rich grins proudly and it’s enough for Michael to smile back and shake his head.

“Sure, you can wait if you want.” He concludes just as he’s done refilling the compartments. He turns to head back to the counter, Rich still following closely behind. “This is good timing, actually. I was planning on watching Repulsion tonight but hey, it’d be cool to watch it with you. My online friend recommended it to me and she said that Catherine Deneuve did a stunning job with the way she--”

“That sounds super interesting but I kinda just wanna make out tonight.” Rich cuts him off and Michael immediately skids his steps to an abrupt halt and looks around, his face hot with embarrassment. Thankfully enough, nobody seems to have caught on what Rich said and he glares at him.

“Dude! Keep it on the down-low!” He hisses.

Rich just blinks at him confusedly but then speaks in a more cautious volume this time. “Why? Don’t your colleagues know you’re gay?”

“That’s not the point. Not even straight-as-fuck couples publicly talk about their plans on making out later.”

“Oh.” Rich nods slowly. “But just to be clear, we _are_ making out in your room, right?”

“No. I really wanna watch Repulsion.” Michael resumes his walk to the counter, going behind it and setting the box on the lower shelf.

“Okay, after we watch Repulsion then!” Rich grins again as he crosses his arms over the counter from the other side.

“Trust me, you will _not_ want to make out after watching it.” Michael turns to face him again, giving him a rather stern look. “The title is very self-explanatory, man.”

“Ugh, you’re not going to make me watch something gory again, are you? I’m still trying to recover from Martyrs.”  

“Repulsion isn’t _that_ gross but… it’s hard to explain.”

“Okay, fine. I trust your judgment.” Rich sighs in defeat, scratching his head then taking a step back from the counter. “Martyrs was still a pretty cool movie after all. Sure it ruined my appetite for days but it was worth it.”

“You’re not gonna be disappointed.” Michael smiles, pleased.

 

# 10\. “We’ll figure it out.”

“Yo, Michael Whoredan! We were just talking about you!”

Rich follows Jake’s gaze and finds Michael walking by with Jeremy and Christine but when their eyes meet, he excuses himself from the two before making his way towards him with a grin. But then his smile mellows down a bit when he seems to remember that Jake and Chloe are close by.

“Uh, you guys were talking about me?” He asks as he stands beside Rich. Rich gives him a pat on the back as a terribly awkward form of greeting.

“Yeah,” Chloe smiles at him, her fingers locked with Jake’s. “We were like totally thinking about doing a double date with you and Rich. Doesn’t that sound _so_ sophisticated?”

Michael gives Rich a puzzling look. “A double date?”

“I told them I would ask you first though!” Rich quickly explains, knowing how much Michael doesn’t like it when decisions are being made for him. He had to learn that the hard way when he once agreed to help Jenna move her stuff to her new bedroom with the promise of Michael coming along. It turned out Michael already had plans with Jeremy to go to some convention that targeted Japanese animation enthusiasts. But since Jenna just had to ‘remind’ him about helping her before Rich could tell him himself, Michael ended up having to cancel his plans. He has this weird thing about not being able to say no to girls.

Because of that, Rich was stripped off of his make-out privileges for a month and that was hell.

“Come on, it’ll be fun!” Chloe insists, squeezing Jake’s hand then hooking his arm over her shoulders. “Jake here has been so stressed about college and prom, it’s about time he loosens up.”

“I’m not _that_ stressed out.” Jake frowns. _“You’re_ just not stressing about it enough.”

“Oh sweetie, I just have my entire life figured out. That’s all.” Chloe says sickeningly sweet as she reaches up to press her lips against his, obviously not giving a damn whether or not a member of the faculty might catch them. Rich catches Michael’s gaze but immediately looks away for a reason he can’t quite figure out.

“Um, I don’t know…” Michael’s voice then breaks the two apart. “No offense but your definition of ‘fun’ doesn't really coincide with mine.”

“What _is_ your definition of fun then?” Jake challenges. “Playing with your lightsaber?”

“Was that a masturbation joke?” Chloe laughs obnoxiously, slapping Jake’s chest. “Baby, you're so bad!”

“Quit it, man.” Rich rolls his eyes. That joke is getting so old, damn. His friend needs to find new material-- the kind that doesn't necessarily make his _boyfriend_ uncomfortable. He glances at Michael and shrugs. “Sorry.”

“It’s cool.” Michael is strangely nonchalant about it. “All the more reason for me not to go to that double date.”

“Don’t be such a killjoy, Michael.” Chloe reaches over to pinch Michael’s cheek much to Michael’s unmistakable discomfort. “We’re just kidding around. Besides, I want to go shopping with you for the date! Wouldn’t that be fun? We can choose the perfect outfits and we’ll look so spectacular, our boys will be so proud to have us in their arms.” She adds gleefully with a wink.

Michael stares at her skeptically. “Okay…? But, why not just go shopping with Rich? Since he’s your friend?”

“Yeah, but aren’t you like the bitch and he’s the butch in your little relationship?” Chloe cocks her head, a smug smile dangling on the corner of her lips while Jake hoots a laugh at that.

“Chloe, shut up.” Rich groans in exasperation as he nudges his friend on the shoulder.

“What? I’m just asking!”

“Wow.” Michael sets his lips in a miffed line. “So I guess that makes Jake the protagonist and you’re the romantic subplot that nobody asked for in your ‘little relationship’, huh?”

Shit. His tone is approaching a noticeably indignant direction, Rich realizes. And knowing Chloe, she will most likely try to further push his buttons just for the sake of her own entertainment. He needs to step in because otherwise, this will get messy.

“Well--” Chloe starts but Rich is quick to cut her off.

“Okaaay, things are getting heated here. Michael and I will just be on our way then.” He slings his arm over Michael’s shoulders and pulls him away from his friends. “We’ll consider the double date, you guys. See ya!” But even as they’re finally walking away from the loose-lipped couple, he could somehow still feel Michael fuming under his hold and he swallows tensely at that. As they turn to an empty corridor, Michael brushes Rich’s arm off of his shoulders and turns to face him.

“I’m just gonna say it-- your friends are dicks.”

“Yeah…” Rich scratches the back of his head sheepishly. “I know.”

“Why do you even hang out with them?”

“Hey, Jake isn’t that bad.” Rich couldn’t help the frown that curls his lips. “Plus, he’s literally the only friend I trust. I’m just forced to hang out with Chloe and Brooke because he’s dating Chloe.”

“Have you considered Jeremy and Christine as options?”

“What?” Rich exhales in disbelief. “Dude, what would we even talk about? We don’t have anything in common. Jeremy’s into all that nerdy kooky shit and Christine is literally and freakishly a character from High School the Musical.”

“Yeah?” Michael crosses his arms, his face twisted into a scowl. “Well _I’m_ into all that so-called nerdy kooky shit and maybe I have grown fond for theatre as well so why the hell are you going out with me?”

“This is different!” Rich throws his hands in the air, knowing he’s probably coming off as over-dramatic but just hearing that question is already exhausting him. “I like you! Like, in the romantic sense! You make me feel stuff that I freaking doubt Jeremy fucking Heere would make me feel. Shit.”

“Hey, Jeremy is a good-looking dude--”

“Okay, but he’s not my type! Christine isn't either.”

Tensed silence hangs in the air and when a few unrecognizable students pass by, the two are quick to step back from each other for the sake of keeping a safe stretch of distance between them. Michael eventually sighs and looks off to the side.

“Yeah, I guess that makes sense. Sorry. I shouldn’t have talked about Jake like that. I know how much you care about him.”

Rich sighs as well, slipping his thumbs into the pockets of his pants. “Sorry I talked about your friends like that too. Jeremy and Christine are pretty cool, actually.”

Finally, a smile stretches Michael’s lips and just as easy as that, Rich suddenly wants to pull him into his arms, kiss him, and promise him that he won’t ever let Chloe talk to him like the way she just did ever again. But then several more students occupy the corridor, and attracting attention to the two of them is frankly the last thing he’d want happening in school.

“Do you want to go to that double date anyway?” Michael asks, his eyes shifting to the passersby before refocusing back on Rich.

Rich shrugs. “Honestly? Not really. They're just gonna ditch us to fuck somewhere. They do that _a lot._ ”

Michael laughs. “Oh thank God. I thought I was gonna have to pretend to enjoy their presence for you.”

“Aww, you’d do that for me, Mikey?” Rich teases, reaching to pinch Michael’s cheek but Michael swats his hand right away before he could do it.

“What if Chloe pesters us about the double date though?” Michael asks with a roll of his eyes.

Rich chuckles. “We’ll figure it out. Don’t worry.”

“For the record, I don’t mind Jake’s presence. And I actually like Brooke.” Michael clarifies with a wag of his finger. “It’s Chloe I’m sick of. She’s just so unnecessarily rude. I don’t know how people put up with her.”

“I’ll have a talk with her about her behavior later. I guarantee you that.” Rich gives him a casual salute and a wink. “But right now, I’m in the mood for some slushie so let’s head over at 7/11.”

“But you have football practice.”

“I still have an hour and a half. I have a coupon here that’s about to expire and I need to use it as soon as possible.”

“You and your coupons.” Michael chuckles as they walk down the hall together, still somehow naturally maintaining a certain distance between them.

“Oh please, you benefit from my coupons and you know it.” Rich laughs, catching a glimpse of a straight couple getting rather touchy by the lockers. Another couple passes by, their hands proudly locked together. Damn, now that he’s noticed it, there sure are a _lot_ of couples in the corridor and not a single one bears any similarities to what he has with Michael. They can’t be the _only_ same-sex couple here, can they?

As subtle as he could, he steals a glance at Michael and not to his surprise, his boyfriend has caught on the sight as well but doesn’t say anything.

Rich clears his throat. “Anyway, do we have anything to watch tonight?”

Michael doesn’t respond right away but when he does, he doesn’t sound like he’s all there. “Huh? What?”

“Do we have anything to watch tonight?” Rich repeats, keeping his eyes up ahead. “I’m in the mood for something funny. Like the one we watched last week? What was that again, Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown? Yeah, that was pretty hilarious. What else do you have--” Before he could turn his head and look at Michael, he feels his boyfriend’s fingers brushing against his and he immediately draws his hand away from his reach out of impulse.

They both stop and stare at each other.

Michael looks just as surprised as he is but neither of them utters a word.

What just happened?

But then slowly, humiliation and hurt surfaces upon Michael’s face as he turns away. “S-Sorry, I… I shouldn’t have--”

“N-No! _I’m_ sorry!” Rich beats him to it, only realizing now what he’s done and feeling an unpleasant sinking sensation in his stomach. “It’s just that… like, you know, we don’t really do that here and--”

“Yeah no, I get it. It’s fine.” Michael forces a smile, rubbing the back of his neck and still refusing to meet his eyes. “It’s uncomfortable, I know. This is your first time with a guy after all. I should have asked for your permission first. That was such an asshole move on my part.”

Rich swallows the lump in his throat, the feeling of dread enclosing around him as he stares at his boyfriend who is clearly struck by how he had just dismissed his desire to hold his hand in public just like the rest of the couples are doing in school. He doesn’t know what to say. He has no idea why he even withdrew from him like that as if the mere thought of being seen with him is bothersome. He doesn’t want Michael to see it that way though because that’s the exact opposite of how he feels.

But he has no idea why he doesn’t mind being publicly affectionate with his boyfriend as long as they’re not at school. Is it because everyone knows him here? Is he afraid?

Maybe he is. Just a little bit.

But that’s not fair to Michael.

“Babe--” He begins but then a voice intervenes.

“Michael!” Jeremy comes in with Christine by his side, holding his hand. “We gotta hurry! Christine’s friend just said she spotted Harrison Ford at Taco Bell! We can’t miss him!”

“W-What? Seriously?” Michael asks, seemingly excited but still not as excited as he should be.

“He’s currently having a volcano burrito!” Christine says enthusiastically, jumping up and down like an eager bunny. “Harrison Ford! Eating a volcano burrito! Just like we do! Who would have thought, right?! Oh, hi Rich!”

Rich just gives her a nod and a small smile. “Hey.”

“Um,” Michael looks at him, discomfort and humiliation still written all over his face. “I’m gonna go with them. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

At the corner of his eye, Rich sees Christine and Jeremy finally reading the atmosphere but they remain quiet. He smiles at Michael anyway. “Yeah, okay. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

 

# 11\. “I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean to.”

“Dude, cheer up. I’m sure we’ll get another chance to see Harrison Ford. Maybe we might even bump into him.” Michael feels Jeremy reaching over the table to give him a pat on the shoulder, clearly misinterpreting his afflicted silence. He doesn’t bother correcting him though-- not when he’s far too occupied stuffing his face with his second burrito. What he did earlier at school is downright stupid and just picturing it in his mind again is giving him nothing but a bad case of cringe attacks and a twinge of dejection. What was he even thinking? He knew what he was signing up for when he decided to get into this relationship.

It makes sense why Rich would still be uncomfortable at the thought of being public about their relationship at school. Back then, he used to be constantly seen with a pretty girl in his arms and not just some geek he somehow took an interest in only when his SQUIP is no longer around to tell him that he could do way fucking better than some nearsighted stoner.

It hurts though…

...having to see the rest of the couples being able to hold hands easily in the hallway while he has to keep his distance from his own boyfriend. It feels like they're always being watched by everyone, especially now that they know they're dating. One simple affectionate display could land them in the principal’s office.

“I don’t think he’s upset about Harrison Ford, Jeremy.” He hears Christine point out; bless her heart. “Michael, are you alright? You and Rich seemed a little…”

“Oh.” Jeremy says in realization. “Yeah, you two were kinda… odd earlier.”

Michael grabs a napkin from the table and sloppily wipes his lips before going back to scarfing down his burrito. “...mm’fine.” He says in between chews.

“You’re obviously not.” Christine says, her tone of concern almost making him want to actually confide to them.

But he tries not to air out any of his relationship issues to anyone. This is something that should be handled and talked about between him and Rich and no one else. He just hopes Rich is doing the same. He doesn't need Jake knowing all about his business.

“You know you can talk to us, right?” Jeremy pries anyway. “If you and Rich are fighting--”

“No, we’re not fighting.” Michael quickly cuts him off after taking one final bite of his burrito. “There was just… it’s hard to explain and no offense, but I don’t think you guys will understand. It’s a…”

“Gay issue?” Jeremy asks a bit uncomfortably.

Michael nods slowly, embarrassed. “Yeah, kinda.”

“I see…” Christine says just as she has finished her taco. “Nevertheless, our ears are always open just in case you need us.”

A grateful smile crests Michael’s lips. “Thanks.”

“But just to be clear though,” she quickly adds as an afterthought, her brows furrowed intensely and her eyes not breaking contact with Michael’s. “Rich isn’t cheating on you, is he? Because if Brooke is as bad as Chloe and got back with him while knowing that he's dating you, then I will--”

“Don’t worry.” Michael shakes his head as he fiddles with the straw of his empty drink. “Rich isn’t good enough of a liar to cheat on me.” But then he stops for a beat before looking back up at Christine. “Wait, he dated Brooke?”

“Um, yes…?” Christine tilts her head slightly to the side in bewilderment as if what she just said is general knowledge. “Don't you remember? When Jake started dating Chloe, Rich dated Brooke. The four of them were the power couples of the school.”

“Michael doesn't keep up with that stuff.” Jeremy explains.

“Oh.”

“Wait wait wait,” Michael then taps his hand on the table in an attempt of stealing Christine’s attention back. “What happened then? I mean, Brooke seems like a nice girl. To a degree, sorta. What happened between them? Who broke up with who?” He’s not exactly mad that Rich never told him this since he has technically always been afraid to ask him about his ex-girlfriends, but it would have still been nice if the blond mentioned it. Especially since he’s been hanging out with this specific ex a lot.

“I don’t know…” Christine seems to hesitate, shrinking into her seat. “It’s not really my business to tell…”

“Christine, pleeeeaaase!” Michael locks his hands together over the table desperately, earning a look of disbelief from his best friend but screw it. “I’ll watch Singing in the Rain with you! And you can follow it up with another musical film! What was the other one you like? Oh, Funny Girl! And and… I’ll pay for the snacks!”

Christine thinks it over. “Can we watch them in your room?”

“Uhh what?” Jeremy butts in skeptically.

Christine giggles and nudges his shoulder. “Don't get any weird ideas! Michael has some kickass speakers and I wanna hear the glorious voices of Gene Kelly and Barbra Streisand vibrating through the walls.”

“Plus, I’m gay, dude.” Michael adds before looking back at Christine. “And sure, we can watch in my room if you want.”

“I wanna watch West Side Story too.” Christine beams but Michael grimaces at that.

“That’s a bit of a stretch now, dudette.”

“Okay, fine. Singing in the Rain and Funny Girl it is then.”

“Great! Now give me the deets.”

“Wow.” Jeremy breathes out a laugh. “Did you just seriously say ‘deets’? You really are starting to sound like Rich.”

“Bite me.” Michael makes a face at him before focusing back on Christine. “Well?”

 _“Well,”_ Christine starts as she folds her hands over the table as though she’s at some professional press conference, ready to pour out the scalding hot tea all the reporters have been aching to have a taste of. “I don’t know much about what happened between them but based on what I’ve heard-- again, what I’ve _heard_ so this can’t be 100% accurate-- but Rich and Brooke dated for four months until Brooke broke it off when she found out Rich cheated on her with Cheryl Ganesh from the cheerleading team and Momo Hazuki from her calculus class for a month and a half.”

“He…” Jeremy looks at his girlfriend, perplexed. “...cheated on her with _two_ different girls?”

Christine shrugs. “That’s what I heard.”

“So I’m guessing Rich isn’t _that_ bad of a liar then...”

Michael taps his fingers on the table as he tries to think this through. Just as Christine had said, she’s only basing this information on what she heard so he can’t entirely place his confidence on the whole story. He knows better than that after all. It’s one of the things Rich said he likes about him-- the fact that he doesn’t pay attention to rumors. In that case, he will just have to talk to him tonight.

“Michael?” Jeremy’s voice catches his attention and he glances up to find his best friend looking at him with genuine concern gracing his features. “You okay, dude?”

“Oh, yeah. Totally.” Michael tries to grin. “I’m just… digesting all this.”

“You should talk to Rich later.” Christine suggests the inevitable. “Communication is the key to a happy relationship after all.”

“Exactly.” Jeremy smiles proudly as he lamely puts his arm over Christine’s shoulders. “Look at us now. The perfect couple.”

Michael rolls his eyes but couldn’t help but smile anyway at how Christine leans up to peck Jeremy’s cheek, clearly not realizing that her boyfriend had said that jokingly. Nevertheless, Jeremy blushes and beams at her. God, they’re so cheesy.

And fuck, they’re really making him miss Rich.

* * *

_Just call him, dude. What are you waiting for?_

Michael’s thumb hovers over Rich’s number on the screen of his phone for good three seconds before he groans and taps it out back to his home screen, his wallpaper of a selfie he took with Rich gleaming before him. A wistful smile breaks through his features at the picture. They took it just two months ago during Jenna’s costume party where they had the _worst_ couple costume to have ever faced the planet. They agreed to go as Ash and Pikachu and even though he had insisted that he wanted to be Ash, he ended up being the latter because Rich apparently didn’t like the thought of being Pikachu. It’ll just give people more reason to poke fun at his height.

Michael still didn’t know how but there was some kind of miscommunication that happened there because when they got to the party, he was dressed in his Pikachu onesie and the ever-so-intelligent Rich arrived dressed as Ash from Army of Darkness (he only used a foam hand for a chainsaw). Why Rich would even think that Ash Williams and Pikachu from Pokemon would pass as a couple costume is beyond him.

But it’s also just _so him_ that Michael couldn’t help but be endeared by the mistake.

He suddenly feels his phone vibrating in his hand and a picture of Rich squishing his face between his hands flashes on the screen. Michael’s heart skips a beat and he straightens up from his seat on the bed, an electrifying shiver of excitement and dread running up his spine.

What should he say?

Should he start with another apology? Should he bring up Brooke? Will Rich get upset if he finds out that he had asked about his relationship with Brooke from someone else?

The vibrating stops and he stares down at the screen, dumbfounded.

Shit. Why the hell did he hesitate?

His phone vibrates again and he jumps in surprise before immediately answering the call without another second thought.

“R-Rich! Hey dude!”

_“...hey. Um…”_

Michael licks his lips nervously. “So… what’s up?”

_“Are you still mad at me?”_

“Mad?” Michael stands up from his bed to pace around his room. “I was never mad at you. Why would you even think that?”

_“Because… I was a fucking jerk…?”_

“No, man. You weren’t. _I_ was being a jerk. I shouldn’t have--”

_“N-No! You should have! You have every right to do that, Michael. I should… I should be able to hold your hand at school proudly like Jake and Chloe or Christine and Jeremy. I’m really sorry. I don’t know what came over me.”_

Michael’s lips tug upwards, endeared. At least he now knows he isn’t alone on having qualms over what happened. “Nevertheless, I still should have talked to you about it first. I know this is your first time dating a guy after all and it’s understandable that you’d still be a bit wary about being all cheesy with me in front of a lot of people who know you. I shouldn’t have put you on the spot. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.”

_“So… we’re not having a fight?”_

Michael laughs. “No, we’re not having a fight.”

 _“Oh, thank God.”_ He could definitely hear the smile in Rich’s voice. _“I was so fucking scared that you might dump me for that. No joke but I was ready to get on my knees and beg you not to leave me. Even if I had to do it in front of the entire school.”_

“Wow, maybe I shouldn’t have answered your call this early then.” Michael teases, running his fingers through his dark hair in relief.

_“Is that sadism I detect?”_

“Don’t push your weird kinks onto me, Goranski.”

_“I know you’ve got some freak in you, man. You gotta unleash that monster someday.”_

“Save it for your dreams, dude.”

_“Fine. Freaky Mikey will sneak into my dreams again tonight. I wonder what he has in store for me this time.”_

“Ugh, you did not just give your fantasy of me a nickname.”

_“Oh yes I did. And speaking of sneaking in, can I come over?”_

Michael glances at the clock displayed just right above his desk and shrugs. “It’s only 8:30 so you don’t really have to sneak in. I’ll head downstairs and meet you at the front door--” His words are immediately interrupted by the sound of three knocks on the window behind him and he yelps in surprise, whipping around just in time to find Rich pushing his window open and stepping into his room.

“Dude!” Michael gasps, his hand coming up to rest against his pounding heart. “Don’t do that! You nearly gave me a heart attack!”

“Sorry, gramps.” Rich chuckles at him. He strolls over to him and tugs him in by the waist, his signature boyish smile surfacing across his charming features. “I was actually already on my way here when I called. Like I said, I was ready to beg you not to leave me. But now we can kiss and make out, yeah?”

“Don’t you mean _kiss and make up?_ Because what you just said is redundant.”

“Nope ‘cause I really wanna make out right now.” And with that, Rich leans in to press their lips together. Michael finds himself sighing into the kiss and closing his eyes anyway as he locks his phone and tosses it to his beanbag chair. His hand automatically comes up to rest it on Rich’s nape while the other presses up against his chest, feeling his boyfriend’s heart pounding just as hard as his and he finds that strangely comforting. He then gently nudges him to sit on his bed which Rich obediently does so.

Michael climbs on top of him and settles on his lap to meet the other’s height without breaking contact, both knees resting on either side of the blond as he feels his practiced tongue slipping and parting his lips and rendering him breathless. He brings his hand up to entangle his fingers through Rich’s dark golden strands, familiar heat churning in his stomach and traveling south.

Now _this_ feels right.

Maybe being public in school doesn’t feel right at the moment but that doesn’t really matter to him anymore. He knows for a fact that they both will have to take baby steps in terms of being comfortable about their relationship around the people they know. It might take a while but why rush it?

He’s convinced that Rich likes him just as much after all. Not even the thought of Brooke could make him insecure.

He feels Rich’s fingers moving up and slipping under his shirt, ghosting over his skin and Michael couldn’t help but break their kiss for a breath of air. But Rich doesn’t seem to have any plans on stopping now for he instinctively moves his face onto his neck to press his warm, wet lips against his skin, his hands gently squeezing his hips as he murmurs something.

“W-What…?” Michael tries to ask breathlessly, feeling himself pressing his lower half down against Rich’s which earns him a suppressed-sounding grunt.

“Nothing.” Rich mumbles against his skin as he pulls back just to turn Michael’s head and take his lips with his again as though to prevent any further dialogue. Far too invested in his hormones, Michael couldn’t bring himself to mind at all as he returns the kiss rather fervently.

* * *

“You look happy.” Is the very first thing Jeremy tells him the second Michael meets him by the lockers before first period and Michael could only shrug his shoulders, knowing that the giddy smile gracing his lips is probably making him look like an idiot. But hey, this was the exact same way Jeremy behaved after he made out with Christine for the first time and Michael had to suffer through all that cheesiness every day. At least he’s not sighing dreamily at the window nor is he quoting every love quote Molly Ringwald has ever uttered in her movies. Jeremy was such a sappy mush of mess at that time.

“I’m guessing you and Rich made up?” His friend asks after shutting his locker closed.

“Yep.” Michael beams, slipping his hands into the pockets of his hoodie. “It turns out I’ve got nothing to be worried about.”

“ _I’m_ still kinda worried, honestly speaking.” Jeremy says with a reluctant look on his face. “After what Christine said yesterday, I just want you to be careful--”

“Michael!”

Michael naturally tunes Jeremy out the second he hears Rich’s voice and he smiles upon seeing him walking towards their direction with Jake, Chloe, and Brooke trailing behind him.

“Oh, hey dude. What’s up--” He stops in mid-sentence when Rich suddenly tugs on his hoodie and presses their lips together.

In front of everyone.

The kiss only lasts for a second or two before Rich pulls away, a proud grin dazzling his handsome face. Michael, on the other hand, is far too astounded to even say anything. And it looks like he’s not the only stunned person in the hallway because when he looks up, he realizes that nearly all eyes are on them-- including their friends. Astonished murmurs of conversation furnish the thick air looming over them and he couldn’t tell if they’re being looked down on for his boyfriend’s sudden public display of affection or not.

“Wow.” He hears Jeremy behind him. “I guess I have nothing to be worried about after all.”

“I’ll see you after practice, man.” Rich says, reaching up to peck Michael on the lips again before brushing past him and gesturing for his friends to follow after.  

“O-Oh… okay, sure…” Michael watches him walk away. He sees Jake throwing his arm over the blond’s shoulders, seemingly making an excited fuss. He feels his face warming up and his heart racing as his lips slowly stretch to another giddy smile.


	2. PART 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I changed my mind about this being a twoshot. It's going to have three chapters in total because I didn't think the scenes I wrote are hella long until I started editing them lmao 
> 
> The last three scenes will be up soon! And I think it's better that way because they're all hella emotional ^^
> 
> Thank you so much for your comments, by the way! You guys are just so nice, I don't deserve ya'll asdsfjklsfhsf

# 12\. “I made this for you.”

“Uh… what’s happening right now?”

Rich blinks in utter bewilderment upon catching sight of Michael checking himself out in his full-body mirror. His boyfriend is dressed in a way that he never thought he would see him dressed in. Michael is clad in a red sweater over a white dress shirt with the collar out, topping it with a cardigan that has even a darker shade of red. Aside from that, he’s wearing a pair of black tight-fitting jeans, dark ankle boots, and a brown beanie sitting neatly just a bit far back over his head _just_ _to show_ that he has also styled his hair to make it stand out under it.

“What do you think?” Michael turns to look at him with a smile that is just dripping with pomposity.

Rich slips his thumbs into the pockets of his cargo jeans and leans his shoulder on the doorframe to Michael’s room. “You look like you’re ready to write an anti-capitalist blog post using your Apple laptop while enjoying Starbucks’ newly overhyped beverage.”

Michael cocks a brow at him, pushing his glasses back up to the bridge of his nose. “That’s… specific.”

Rich snorts a laugh. “You ask. I deliver.”

“Idiot. I want to know if you like it or not.”

“Oh.” Rich still lingers by the door. “Why does that matter?”

“Because you’re my boyfriend?”

Rich shrugs. “I dunno. You do you, dude.”

“Come on!” Michael’s eyes roll skyward in annoyed disbelief. “Just tell me whether you like it or not.”

“Hm…” Rich taps his chin in thought before moving his finger to a twirling motion. “Can you turn around a bit?” Michael shrugs and does so much to the content of the blond who has a one-sided smile dangling at the corner of his lips. “It fits your ass nicely so sure, it works for me.”

“You’re hopeless.” Michael immediately turns back to the mirror, shaking his head.

Rich chuckles anyway before making his way towards the other male. “Why are you even dressing up like this? What’s wrong with your usual style?”

“I’m just experimenting.” Michael says as he adjusts his beanie.

Rich isn’t impressed. He _likes_ the way Michael normally dresses. Sure, jorts aren’t exactly what most kids their age are into these days but that’s what he likes about him-- he doesn’t really care what’s in or out as long as he genuinely enjoys them. His lame sense of fashion is what makes him _him,_ and taking that away just wouldn’t be the same.

“No one’s making you do this, right?” He decides to ask just to be sure. If Michael really does want to change his style for the sake of wanting to and not because he was told to, then so be it.

“Not really?” Michael turns to look at him. “I mean, Christine is a huge influence. We’ve been going to this independent cafe that opened up just nearby and their poetry nights are pretty entertaining. Others should learn to appreciate poetry more, you know? Some people just don't know what real writing is these days. Christine thinks most people only read books _after_ they’ve been adapted into famous films because they love jumping into bandwagons and not being capable enough to form their own opinion on anything-- mainstream media or not. You know what I mean?”

“Uhh, sure, I guess. What does Jeremy think about all this?”

“He used to come along but he realized that it’s just not for him.”

“Okay…” Rich nods, his gaze trailing down to his boyfriend’s legs and admittedly liking the way they look in those jeans. “Why am I only hearing about this now?” It’s strange that Michael never brought up his new interest when he's the type of person who really wouldn't stop rambling about the stuff he’s so passionate about.

Michael just shrugs his shoulders as he turns around to rummage through his closet. “Because I figured it’s not really your cup of tea. You don't like coffee shops and you think slam poetry is for people who try too hard. _'Why don't they just rap like a normal person'_ were your exact words as far as I could remember.”

Rich blinks. “I don’t remember saying that but that does sound like me.”

Michael laughs before picking something up from his closet. “Here, I made this for you.” He says, turning around to toss him a blue knitted beanie and Rich catches it easily.

“What's this?”

“A tennis racket.” Michael says without missing a beat. “It’s a hat, dude.”

“You made this?” Rich feels the fabric in his hands before putting it on and looking at his reflection in the mirror. Heh, he really looks good in anything. “Wow, it looks pretty neat. Thanks! Since when did you start knitting?”

“Since Christine got into it. People think knitting is lame but I think they just don't have the patience to create something that doesn't require relying on a machine.” Michael joins him by the mirror, reaching up to adjust the blond’s beanie so that it’s styled in the way his own hat is. “I didn't think you'd like it though. I kinda thought a homemade beanie just doesn't suit your taste.”

“Yeah, but you made it.” Rich smiles at him before planting a peck on his lips. Just as he's expected, Michael grows flustered by the gesture. His grin grows wider at that and he kisses him for the second time, pulling his boyfriend closer by the waist. “So what, you want me to dress up like a hipster now too?”

“Wait, what?” Michael steps back, seemingly taken by surprise. “I am _not_ dressed like a hipster.”

_Oh shit. Wrong words._

Too late to back out now though.

“I-I mean…” Rich gestures to him a bit uncertainly, not exactly sure how to phrase it right without eliciting an argument. “Come on, man. You’re obviously _dressed_ for the part. You do supposedly “underrated” stuff. You frequent a coffee shop… and you look down on people who like _mainstream media_ and rely on _technology!_ I dunno about you but those two things are pretty much us in a nutshell.”

Michael immediately opens his mouth as though he has a counter-argument prepared but then refrains himself from saying anything at all. He pauses and looks back at his own reflection while Rich just patiently waits for whatever reaction he's going to get out of the taller teen.

“Oh my god…” Michael’s eyes widen in pure shock as if he just witnessed a gruesome murder. ‘I’m going through a hipster phase, aren't I?”

Rich’s lips stretch to an amused smile before he reaches out to drape his arm over the other male’s shoulders and look at him through the mirror. “And it looks like Christine is going through it too. Man, I wonder how Jeremy’s handling her right now.” He reaches up to kiss Michael on the cheek. “But hey, like I said, you do you. I like you in those jeans anyway.”

“Ugh, this is humiliating.” Michael looks defeated. “And I hate these jeans! I thought I’ll get used to it but it’s just so damn uncomfortable. And why do I need three layers of clothing?” He pulls away from Rich to yank his cardigan off before reaching down to pull his sweater off of him, unmindful of the way Rich’s eyes are looking down to catch a glimpse of the very fleeting sight of the naturally tanned expanse of his exposed stomach. He nearly knocks his glasses off in the process but readjusts them and tosses the sweater onto the bed. He looks back in the mirror and straightens his white dress shirt and rips his beanie off of his head, his face twisted in a self-disgusted scowl.

“Thank god I have you around to call me out on my shit.” He says, unbuttoning the first few buttons of his shirt then turning to head for his closet to probably look for his signature hoodie.

“There’s nothing wrong with being a hipster, dude.” Rich shrugs. “Hipsters are pretty hot as long as they're not annoyingly pompous about it.”

“But I _was_ being annoyingly pompous about it, wasn’t I?” Michael retorts, still rummaging through his closet. “Now get outta here. I have to change.”

“You a girl?” Rich makes a  _pfft_ sound as he takes a few steps closer to the other male to tap his ass. Michael jumps and swats his hand away without breaking his focus on his hunt for a decent outfit. Rich laughs and pinches his hip this time, his hand earning another smack from his boyfriend. He steps back and lets him be. “It’s not like I haven’t seen you in your boxers before, man. Feel free to undress in front of me as slowly as you like.”

“You really have no tact.” Unsurprisingly, Michael takes out a dark red galaxy-printed hoodie and a pair of old jeans and lays them on the bed. “And because you have no tact, I want you out of my room. Every time I try to get dressed, you completely forget about self-control and just try to make out with me.”

“You say that like it’s a bad thing…” Rich frowns, though he could feel his own cheeks warming up at the fact that Michael had actually caught on that.

“I don't mind it most of the time.” Michael strides over to him and gives him a soft peck on the lips. Rich wants to do more but the taller teen has already pulled back. “But this time is not one of them. I really wanna watch Star Trek Beyond and the thought of missing it in the theaters physically pains me.”

“Can’t we watch something else?” Rich whines, his hand reaching out to fiddle with Michael’s fingers. “You can watch Star Truck with Jeremy tomorrow. They’re showing Lights Out right now and that movie looks hella promising.”

“Star _Trek_.” Michael corrects him but he doesn’t sound miffed by the mistake. “And no, I can’t. He already watched it with Christine yesterday because _somebody_ wouldn’t let me leave my room, and _that’s_ what I was talking about when I said you have no self-control whatsoever. Thank god I haven’t slept with you yet or I would have been chained to my bed by now.”

“Okay okay, sorry.” Rich brings his hands up in surrender. “I’ll try not to get in the way of your nerdy activities with your nerdy boyfriend and just-- ow!” He immediately draws back after Michael flicks his forehead and he pouts at him. “What was that for?”

“For calling Jeremy my boyfriend, _again._ ”

“Oh, you guys aren’t dating anymore? Nooo, what happened?”

“Are you asking to get hit?”

Rich chuckles and shakes his head. “Okay, fine. I’ll stop. Go get dressed then. I’ll just… I dunno, go bother Micah, I guess.”

“He’s in the living room.” Michael gently nudges him out. “You should ask him if he wants to tag along. I asked him earlier and he said he’ll go if you go.”

“Ouch.” Rich throws him a grin over his shoulder as he lets himself be pushed out of the room. “It looks like your little brother likes me more than you.”

“That’s because you spoil him.” Michael then moves to close the door but not before giving the blond one last look. “And keep that beanie on. It really looks good on you.” And with that, he shuts the door closed.

Rich just stares at the door for a good few seconds. Then he reaches up to adjust his beanie just the way he likes it.

 

# 13\. “Don’t worry about me.”

Something doesn’t feel right.

It isn’t strange that Rich would spontaneously want to come over in the middle of the night. In fact, he does that a lot and Michael couldn't tell if it’s because he likes the defiant thrill of it or he just really likes climbing stuff. But upon looking at the time on his phone, the bespectacled teen realizes that it’s _three in the morning_ and he just received a text from Rich asking if he could come over. He doesn’t come by this late, not even once. Michael sighs and reaches out to unlock his window. It’s just a good thing that he still hasn't gone to sleep yet or he would have completely missed his text.

He starts cleaning his room up a bit, picking up all the used clothes he had strewn about the carpet and heads to his bathroom to toss them into the hamper. Rich is already used to the mess but Michael feels like there is definitely something wrong and the last thing he wants his boyfriend to see is how he still couldn't be bothered cleaning up his room.

Just as he’s done sweeping the place clean and freshening up, he hears the familiar creaking of his window and he peeks out of his bathroom to find Rich’s silhouetted figure stepping in discreetly. Michael briskly turns the bathroom light off and moves to turn his bedside lamp on instead before heading straight towards his boyfriend who doesn’t move from where he’s standing.

“Rich, what’s going on--” Michael begins but pauses upon catching sight of a purple bruise forming just above Rich’s eyebrow and a deep cut sliced on the corner of his lips. He trails his gaze down and while he can’t see very well with only his bedside lamp as his source of light, he could still see a few fragments of faint developing bruises enclosed around Rich’s neck. Their eyes meet and Michael parts his lips, different questions whirling in his head but failing to utter a single one.

Somehow, he has always had a sneaking suspicion that Rich doesn't live with the most ideal family but he couldn't find it in himself to pry. Rich would never have told him anything anyway unless he's ready.

In spite of his suspicion though, Michael couldn't help the tight ache that stings inside his chest the second Rich just smiles at him as if what he just obviously went through isn't that big of a deal. Michael brings his hand up to gently caress his boyfriend’s jaw, his eyes searching his face for any other bruises.

“What happened?”

Rich takes his hand and moves it to his lips instead to kiss his palm, mindful of the cut near the corner of his lower lip. “Nothing to be concerned about.” He murmurs against his skin, closing his eyes. “Just had a stupid fight with my dad.”

Michael frowns. “Did he do this to you?”

Rich forces out a chuckle and redirects his eyes at him. “It’s not like I didn't get a few good hits in, Mikey. I’d like to think it was a pretty fair fight between men.” 

Michael could tell Rich is only lying and playing this off lightly so as not to get him worried but unfortunately, it’s far too late for that. He’s already concerned and seeing him trying to smile everything away is just making it worse. He sighs and tugs the blond’s hand to lead him to his bed. “Let me patch you up.” He says as Rich comfortably sits down on the mattress, just silently nodding his head as he does so. Michael walks up to his closet and reaches for the first aid kit his mom had nagged him to keep. Who would have thought the unbearable nagging of his mother would come in handy?

“Here.” He says as he kneels down on the floor in front of Rich and opens the kit. “I’m sure you don’t need me warning you how much this will sting.”

A lackluster smile graces Rich’s features. “I’m used to it. Hit me with your best shot.”

Michael shakes his head in disbelief before starting to treat his boyfriend’s injuries. Rich is doing a good job of trying hard not to wince. “Are you going to tell me the details to how this exactly happened?”

Rich doesn’t answer right away, his eyes fixated down instead. Michael notices the way he’s fumbling with his fingers-- a habit he inevitably does every time he’s in a state of emotional panic or dread. Michael purses his lips at the motion and sighs. He doesn’t have to ask again to know that he’s not going to get anything from him no matter how many times he asks him.

Is this why he doesn’t want him to see where he lives?

“Does Brooke know about this?” He finds himself asking without a second thought. He recalls Brooke knowing where Rich lives and how Rich had agreed to let her drive him home without a single complaint. He knows it’s silly to let something as immature as ‘jealousy’ overwhelm him at this very moment but nothing just makes sense to him anymore. Rich only dated Brooke for four months and yet she still knows more about his personal life than he does. Why couldn’t Rich tell him anything?

As always, Rich doesn’t say a word and Michael didn’t think his silence would sting this hard.

He decides to aim his entire concentration on treating the other male’s injuries instead, trying his best not to pay any mind to how painfully tight his throat feels. He wants to snap at Rich-- yell at him, even. Demand why he couldn’t trust him with anything but could very well trust someone else who he cheated on so easily with two different girls. What could Brooke possibly do that he can’t?  Why couldn’t he just let him in? What if things get worse and the day comes where Rich just doesn’t show up at school anymore? What would he be left to do?

It hurts him just thinking about how the guy everyone at school had come to love is so full of energy and is constantly grinning but then has to go home to a father who clearly beats him up. He could just imagine the energy in their house and it doesn’t seem like a place Rich belongs to.  

His concerns come to an immediate halt when he feels Rich running his thumb over his cheek, wiping the tears he didn’t even know have streamed down from his eyes. Michael immediately jerks away from his touch and takes his glasses off to wipe his tears himself.

“S-Sorry.” He mentally curses himself at the way his voice hitches pathetically. “I just hate seeing you like this.”

Rich still doesn’t say anything, probably not knowing how to react. But his choice to stay silent is only making Michael feel even more alone and helpless.

Michael gives up and slumps on his spot, letting his tears spill down his face as his shoulders heave with every attempt of trying not to cry too hard. This is the first time he’s let anyone see him like this-- a complete sobbing mess. Not even Jeremy has seen this side of him. But… he feels so incompetent. He doesn’t know what to do to make his own boyfriend feel better or how to get him out of the domestic abuse he is clearly trapped in.

“Ah, fuck. Sorry...” He apologizes again with a heavy exhale, looking away. “I shouldn’t make this about me. I shouldn’t even be the one crying here. This is so fucking selfish of me.”

“Don’t talk like that.” Rich finally says and Michael feels his hand gently tugging his arm and silently urging him to join him on the bed. After a second of hesitation, he concedes and moves to sit down beside the blond-- still not finding the courage to meet his eyes. Nevertheless, Rich reaches up to angle his face towards him and plants a gentle kiss on his lips before pulling away and resting his forehead against his.

“Can I sleep here tonight?” He asks softly.

Michael swallows the lump in his throat. “Of course. You didn’t even have to ask.”

Rich smiles then moves to kiss his forehead. “Thanks.”

Michael pulls away and wipes his tears with the back of his hand. Rich reaches out to help, his thumb running over his cheek before carefully down to his lips where it stays there for a moment. He looks like he’s far too lost in his own thoughts and Michael decides to stay quiet, hoping that maybe his boyfriend is finally considering telling him everything. While the thick dead air is killing him, he knows better than to rush the blond into anything. Rich has mentioned before that he doesn’t work well under pressure.

Finally, Rich sighs and takes Michael’s hand in his to kiss his palm again. The familiar gesture brings such an immense wave of comfort to Michael and he moves his hand away from the other male’s lips and up to caress his cheek. Rich only closes his eyes and leans into his touch, his hand coming up to rest against his like a kitten in need of warmth and affection.

A few minutes of silence pass by but somehow, Michael isn’t that bothered about it anymore.

Just knowing that Rich is safe here with him is good enough for now.

“You know,” Rich finally speaks up, taking Michael’s hand in his again and moving it down to his lap just so he could mindlessly play with his fingers. “this might sound lame but… I feel really safe when I’m by your side instead of by myself with my own thoughts.”

“That doesn’t sound lame at all.” Michael lets out a soft breath of laughter, gently squeezing Rich’s hand.

He sees a smile stretching Rich’s lips but he could tell there is still a small trace of force in it-- like he _does_ feel better now but only to a meager degree.

“Rich?”

“Brooke knows.”

Michael pauses and holds his breath. “Huh?”

Rich directs his gaze down to their hands and shrugs his shoulders. “Brooke knows about… my dad. I didn’t want her to know-- I didn’t want _anyone_ to know.”

“But… then why--”

“It was _her_.” Rich then looks up at him, uneasiness in his eyes. “My SQUIP. She wanted me to date Brooke to get to Jake and she knew that Brooke has a soft spot for guys with a stupid tragic backstory so I was pushed to tell her about my dad. She was hooked right then and there.”

“Oh… Rich…” Michael says for lack of a better response, feeling an unpleasant twist in his chest just thinking about Rich being forced to tell someone about something he’s fought so hard to keep hidden. Not knowing what else to say, he just gives his hand another reassuring squeeze and earns a small smile of gratitude for that.

Rich shakes his head and rubs his nape with his free hand. “This is why I couldn’t let you walk me home or why I couldn’t let you drop me off right outside my house. The place is a fucking mess, Michael. In and out. My dad drinks a lot and if I’m lucky, he passes out by nine. But if he doesn’t, I get a beating for whatever reason he could find. Today, he just simply told me that he hates seeing…” He stops and looks down at his arms. “...these.”

Michael follows his gaze and realizes that he’s referring to the burn scars he got from the day his SQUIP made him set Jake’s house on fire. “He… hates your scars?”

Rich visibly swallows and nods. “My aunt refuses to give us any more money unless dad gets back on his feet and find a job. Because of that, we’ve been having a lot of financial issues and he remembered all the hospital bills he had to cover just for me last year.”

“But it’s not like you asked to get into an accident like that.” Michael says but Rich only shrugs his shoulders.

“That’s what I said earlier. I lost my cool and he hit me. I guess it is kinda my fault. I mean, no matter how you look at it, he’s still my dad and I shouldn’t have raised my voice at him.”

“And he shouldn’t have hit you either.” Michael frowns, feeling an indignant nerve working along his jaw.

Strangely enough, Rich seems to be taken aback by what he said. “S-Still, he sacrificed so much for me, you know?  He didn’t even want a second kid but he insisted on raising me anyway, even without my mom’s help. There are so many kids out there who got disowned by their parents. I’m lucky enough to still have him around. And what the hell did I do to repay him? By being a fucking mess. I’ve caused him nothing but headaches. If I didn’t take the SQUIP at all, I wouldn’t have...” He stops again to look down at the scars on his arms, a bitter frown curling his lips. “...dad deserves better than this. After everything he’s done for me--”

“Rich, stop.” Michael holds his free hand up and closes his eyes, trying his very best not to show his resentment at how people have obviously told Rich that he should feel like he owes his abusive father for simply _doing his job as a father._ There has never been a single moment where his own parents made him feel like he’s forcing them to raise him whether he was an unplanned child or not. They raised him because they should-- they brought him into this world after all. But the fact that they don’t tell him that he owes them for being good parents only makes him respect them so much more and it’s already an unspoken guarantee that he will take good care of them when the time comes.

But as for Rich… the way he’s thinking right now, this could only mean his father abuses him physically _and_ emotionally.

Michael opens his eyes and meets his boyfriend’s gaze. Rich looks so...shaky and fragile. He’s never seen him like this before. And just remembering how the blond had resentfully looked down at the very same scars he used to smile and brag about as ‘battle scars’ just pushes Michael to detest his abusive father even more. Without a word, he moves closer to the other male and squeezes his hand before bringing it up to kiss his fingers. He then travels over to his wrist, planting a careful delicate kiss on the scar marked on it before making his way up to his arm to kiss the rest of the scars scattered on his skin as gently as he could as though putting any more force into the contact might make them fade away.

Eventually, he leans in further to plant a soft fleeting peck on his boyfriend’s lips before pulling back a bit to look at him. Despite the mild lighting he gets from his bedside lamp, he could see a flustered look blooming on Rich’s freckled face and he offers him a small reassuring smile.

“Your father shouldn’t make you feel like you owe him just because he did what he’s supposed to do as your father. People may have told you that you shouldn’t be pissed at him for hitting you and that you should forgive him just because he’s your dad but that’s not right, and it’s insensitive and self-righteous of them to even suggest that idea. Is he even apologetic for what he did or did he say you made him do it? Did he say he only did it out of love because you needed the discipline?”

Rich looks away and that alone is enough of an answer for Michael. “You can’t dismiss the fact that he hits you, Rich. He’s toxic. And I don’t know if it matters or not but whatever the hell he said about your scars, I think he’s wrong. I like seeing them on you.” To emphasize his point, he draws back to bring his boyfriend’s hand up and kisses the scar on his wrist again before returning his gaze at him. “It reminds me of the time you decided that you want to be your own person-- that you don’t want anyone telling you what kind of guy you should be or how you should behave in a way that people would approve of. Yeah, buying a SQUIP was a fucking horrible decision to make but… if you think about it, we wouldn’t even be here right now if you didn’t. We wouldn’t have encountered each other at the Halloween party because I probably wouldn’t have gone there at all. We wouldn’t have had those days together at the hospital.”

A weak smile graces Rich’s lips as their eyes meet. “Yeah. I wouldn’t even be alive right now if it wasn’t for her. I was just so damn suicidal back then.”

Michael rubs his thumb over Rich’s hand, picturing just how hard it must have been for the shorter male to make him even think of ending his own life. He’s too scared to even imagine how his own life would have turned out if Rich isn’t with him.

“What matters is that you’re here now.” He says with a smile. “Safe with me. And you don’t even need your SQUIP to get me to like you.”

“...I still have no idea what you see in me.” And just like that, Rich’s smile grows wider and more genuine. He reaches for him to bring their lips together again. Michael is prepared to respond to the kiss right away and he feels the blond’s hand going up to his nape while the other gently pushes him down onto his back so he could move on top of him. Michael’s hand works its way up to the clean line of his boyfriend’s jaw while the other just holds onto his back to pull him closer as a stifled sound erupts from the back of his throat. He feels Rich’s tongue prying his lips apart and delving in, taking the lead as always.

Unfortunately, they are interrupted by the sound of Rich’s phone vibrating in his pocket. Rich draws back a bit and they stare at each other, contemplating on whether or not they should ignore it.

Michael is the first to break from the moment of hesitation by gently nudging his boyfriend off of him. “Dude, you gotta answer that.”

“Goddammit.” He hears Rich mutter as they sit up.

Michael adjusts his glasses and watches Rich take a quick glance at his phone. He catches on the frown that curves the blond’s lips but Rich doesn’t tell him anything and answers the call instead.

“What?” He pauses. “Does it matter? No. I’m over at a friend’s house. You don’t know him. I was just--” He pauses again and sighs. “Yeah, okay. Mhm. I don’t know. All right.” He finally hangs up and slips his phone back into his pocket.

Michael scratches his neck. “Was that… your dad?”

Rich nods. “He wants me to go home.”

“Oh…”

“But I’m not going. I’m too tired.” Rich sighs, rubbing the back of his neck before rolling his right shoulder.

“Wanna get some sleep then?” Michael asks.

Rich smiles and nods again. “Yep. Thank god it’s Friday, huh?”

Michael returns his smile as he takes his glasses off and settles it on the bedside table, turning the lamp off in the process. They both comfortably settle on the bed together, both facing each other. Michael leans in to peck his lips again simply because he has no restraint at all. Nevertheless, it earns him a smile from the other. Rich takes his hand in his and lays them down on the small space between them, a warm comfortable smile tugging the corners of his lips. This isn’t exactly the first time they've slept on the same bed together since it’s ridiculously common how they tend to take naps a lot in this very room every after school. But this is the first time they’re sleeping together in the middle of the night and somehow, Michael prefers it this way.

He then gently squeezes his hand. “What's gonna happen tomorrow? With your dad, I mean.”

Rich shrugs. “I dunno, but I think I know how to handle him now.”

“Really?”

“Michael,” Rich’s eyes search his face. “you’re the only person who’s ever told me that I don't owe my dad anything. Even Brooke told me that I should forgive him because he's my dad and I always thought that's the right way to look at it. But now... for once in my life, I actually feel like I deserve better.”

“And you do.” Michael confirms with a nod. “Do you know what you're going to say to him?”

“Don't worry about me.” Rich gives his hand a soft peck and closes his eyes. “I can handle him. Thanks to you.”

“Okay…” Michael concedes as he watches Rich finally drift off to sleep. There's no doubt in mind that he still dreads of what has yet to come on the following day but he knows that he should at least be grateful that Rich is safe with him here. Now he has a sanctuary to go to and Michael will always be here to make him feel safe again.

 

# 14\. “I like your laugh.”

“Wait, I don’t get it. Who’s this supposed to be?”

“That’s Chilli! He has a very hot temper.”

“Huh…”

Rich furrows his brows as he tries to comprehend what exactly is going on with the events happening in the comics Micah has been working on nearly all afternoon. Rich had been merely sitting on the carpet, watching TV when the kid moved down from the couch to sit on his lap and continue his drawings on the coffee table. He wouldn’t have minded at all if it wasn’t for the fact that Micah has not moved off of him ever since and he could now barely feel his legs. But what the hell, right? The kid looks happy so he should might as well let him be.

The luscious aroma of warm homemade dinner drifts from the kitchen and into the living room, though it only does nothing but make Rich’s stomach growl more. He wanted to help Michael and Mrs. Mell prepare dinner but for some reason, Michael prefers to keep him _out_ of the kitchen. Rich has gone there several times before and he couldn’t think of a single reason as to why he’s not allowed to step in there tonight.

As Micah flips to the next page of his notebook, a certain character catches the blond’s attention. “Whoa, who’s that guy?” He asks as he points at a drawing of a bespectacled meerkat playing video games.

“Oh, that’s Miguel.” Micah smiles proudly before darkening the character’s glasses with his pencil. He has a thick Filipino accent compared to Michael’s. Michael has explained before that Micah doesn’t get along well with anyone at school due to the fact that they still insist on calling him ‘Mikayla’. He just spends most of his time with his Filipino cousins instead. “He’s Ricky’s brother. He likes video games and doesn’t go out at all. He barely sleeps but has a big appetite.” Now concentrated on the character, Micah doesn’t say anything more and focuses on refining Miguel’s design.

Rich couldn’t help but snicker in amusement when the kid adds a rainbow flag patch on the meerkat’s red shirt. “Lemme guess, he’s inspired by your brother, huh?”

Micah looks back at him over his shoulder in what appears to be genuine astonishment. “How can you tell?”

“I’m smarter than I look.” Rich gives him a one-sided smile. Micah looks impressed and opens his mouth to respond, but then another voice beats him to it.

“I know, I was just as shocked.” Michael comes striding in and plops down onto the couch with a sigh, the sharp smell of peanut sauce clinging to his clothes. “I always kinda thought he doesn’t do particularly well at school but it turns out our grades aren’t even that far off.”

“I was just as much of a nerd before as you are, you know.” Rich grins proudly at him and Michael just chuckles at that before rifling his fingers through his boyfriend’s blond hair affectionately as if he’s rewarding him with his acknowledgment.

“You? A nerd?” Micah looks up at Rich, disbelief written all over his soft round features. “You were like _Kuya?_ I find that hard to believe. Aren’t you too cool to be a nerd?”

“Hey,” Michael gives his little brother a nudge on the leg with his foot, his fingers still playing with Rich’s hair. “what’s that supposed to mean?”

Rich laughs anyway. “We all gotta start somewhere, right?”

Micah looks back over his other shoulder and throws a glare at Michael. Rich has already gotten used to the two brothers’ banters and normally doesn’t like to butt in anymore. It made him uncomfortable before but he has come to realize that it’s just really the way they interact-- there’s not a trace of actual malice in it. Maybe it’s something that he will never completely understand considering the fact that he has never had a close bond with his own brother. At least not anymore. The guy was always out of the house which is expected of him. And when the time came, he went off to college and never came back. Not even for holidays. Rich has no idea where he is now.

He then notices Micah’s auburn eyes looking up and eyeing the way Michael is playing with his blond hair. The younger Mell’s expression turns even sourer. “Aren’t you supposed to be helping mama with dinner?”

“I’m taking a break.” Michael answers nonchalantly. “Why aren’t _you_ helping her?”

“Because I’m busy.”

“Yeah, sure.” Michael snorts a laugh in derision.

“So tell me more about Miguel.” Rich reaches out to tap on Micah’s drawing, somehow getting the hint that Micah is getting thoroughly annoyed. This is supposed to be a pleasant family occasion after all. Michael’s dad had gone on a business trip for a month and a half and is set to be home before dinner. It turns out the Mell’s always prepare a small simple feast to celebrate his safe arrival from an overseas trip.

Thankfully enough, Micah gets easily distracted and redirects his attention back to his work. “Miguel’s a big-headed jerk.” He starts drawing horns on the meerkat’s head and a pitchfork in his hand. “And he has a weird laugh.”

“A weird laugh?” Michael scoffs. “Oh come on, you’ve never commented on my laugh before.”

“That’s because I’ve been nice.”

“Are you telling me _this_ is _you_ holding back?”

“Yes.”

Michael nudges Micah’s leg again, a bit harsher this time and Micah swats his foot away. Michael then crosses his legs on the couch before tapping Rich’s shoulder. “Do I have a weird laugh?”

Rich looks up at him and grins. “I like your laugh. It’s cute.”

Michael looks content with his response for he smiles smugly at his brother. “That’s good enough for me.”

“Shut up.” Micah fumes, now drawing flames all over the character. “Miguel still has a weird laugh… and steals candies from kids whenever they’re not looking.”

“That’s a bit harsh,” Michael comments, though it’s clear that he isn’t taking the insult all too seriously. “I thought I’m supposed to be the voice of reason?”

“Not anymore.” Micah then draws the character a pointed tail. “Miguel is now a big-headed jerk who flaunts around.”

“I swear, I have no idea what you’re talking about.” As though to prove a point, Michael leans in and Rich glances at him in curiosity but then receives a peck on the lips. He blinks confusedly at his boyfriend but when he realizes that Michael isn’t even looking at him, he follows his gaze and realizes that Micah had seen the gesture and doesn’t look particularly happy about it.

“Dude.” Rich nudges Michael away, somewhat embarrassed.

Micah clenches his jaw. _“Mama! Nangiinis na naman si kuya!”_

“Michael, leave your brother alone!” Mrs. Mell calls out from the kitchen.

Michael frowns. “Blabbermouth.”

“Bighead.” Micah bites back.

Rich just watches them call each other playground-level names back and forth, feeling rather uncomfortable since he’s sorta sandwiched between them. He knows better than to intervene though. The last time he did that, he ended up being forced to choose a side which is never an easy decision to make. He knows that he should always choose Michael’s side since he _is_ his boyfriend, but he also has to choose Micah’s side because he really wants to get to his family’s good side.

Fortunately, Mrs. Mell’s comes in. “Please take it down a notch, you two. You’re making poor Rich uncomfortable.”

“Nah, I’m fine.” Rich lies with a smile. “They do this all the time anyway.”

“That doesn’t make me feel better at all.” Mrs. Mell sighs, shaking her head. “Michael, come and help me in the kitchen again. Your father misses your _arroz marinero_ so that’s exactly what we’re giving him.”

“On it.” Michael is quick on his feet, messing Micah’s hair before immediately dashing away to dodge a hit from the kid.

“Is there anything I can do to help?” Rich immediately asks, looking for an opportunity to get up on his feet and shake his legs awake.

“Sorry, man.” Michael pauses by the doorway to the kitchen. “You’re kinda clumsy and mom values her kitchenware too much. Maybe you can just set the table? The plates are already stacked in the dining room. Micah, go help your crush out.”

Rich senses Micah’s entire form tense up at the assumption. “H-He’s not my crush!” The young boy screeches but Michael just laughs him off before disappearing into the kitchen.

Rich couldn't help but roll his eyes at his boyfriend’s pettiness before patting Micah’s leg. “C’mon, kid. Let's go set the table.”

Micah doesn't say anything else and immediately gets up on his feet, uncharacteristically avoiding eye contact. Now Rich feels kinda bad. He was completely oblivious of the kid’s infatuation for him until Michael pointed it out when the three of them were having a Ghostbusters movie marathon. Micah had revealed how Michael used to pine for Jeremy from third grade all the way to freshman year and out of defensive instinct, Michael mentioned the younger Mell’s infatuation for Rich and that got awkward real quick.

Rich doesn’t even mind that Michael had a crush on Jeremy before. It was pretty obvious after all. Jeremy is just a really clueless guy.

Nevertheless, he tries to play off Micah’s crush on him by pretending that he doesn’t even remember that night happening at all, but it turns out Michael is pettier than he thought because now he keeps bringing it up every time Micah behaves like ‘an insufferable brat’.

As they begin to set the table, Rich steals a glance at the young boy and notices his face completely flushed and tensed.

Yikes.

“So,” he tries to save the evening from any awkward tension. “do you have any idea what time Mr. Mell will get here?”

Micah chews on his bottom lip for a second or two before answering. “H-He’ll probably be home in half an hour… or so…”

“Do you miss him?”

“Of course.” Micah stiffly nods his head. “He said he’ll buy me a bunch of cool stuff from Tokyo. I just hope he keeps his word.”

Rich grins teasingly. “So are you looking forward to your new toys or to your dad’s arrival?”

Micah then finally looks up at him, seemingly conflicted by the question and that’s enough to make Rich laugh a bit. His laugh apparently eases the tension because the younger male smiles at long last and chuckles sheepishly before finally setting the last glass near the plate. “Dad said he bought you some stuff too.”

Rich pauses, pointing to himself. “Me?”

“Yep.” Micah smiles. “Michael told him you really like Pacific Rim so… I’m guessing he bought you a toy too.”

Wow…

Rich isn’t sure what to say now. Of course, he has formed a close bond with Michael’s family but he didn’t think he’d matter enough for them to remember him when he’s not around. Aside from those pairs of boxers and the keychain Jake and Michael got him for Christmas, he couldn’t exactly remember when was the last time someone actually gave him something that was meant to delight him. Holiday celebrations have stopped existing back at home when his mom passed away but now, maybe he finally has someone to spend holidays with. The Mell’s may not be his family by blood but they’re more of a family than his own could ever be.

“As requested by my dear little brother,” Michael announces his presence by walking into the dining room with a large bowl of beef stew that whiffs of peanut sauce in his hands. “I told ma we should also have _Kare Kare_ for dinner. Because I’ve been such an ass for the past few days, I figured I should make something that will earn me your forgiveness-- a peace offering, if you will.”

Micah gasps at the sight and jumps on his spot eagerly. “Yes! _Kare Kare!_ Finally!”

“Whoa, hold on.” Michael almost drops the bowl the very second Micah jumps in to hug him. He sets the bowl down before patting his little brother’s head.

Rich couldn’t help but smile at the sight, recalling how he used to have the same bond with his own brother when they were kids. His eyes then meet Michael’s and Michael just grins at him, jutting his thumb up as if expressing his success in earning Micah’s forgiveness. Rich chuckles and shakes his head.

There’s no use looking back at the old days.

He has a new family now.

 

# 15\. “It’s okay.  I couldn’t sleep anyway.”

“Rich? What's wrong? What happened?” Michael is quick to answer his phone the very second he saw his boyfriend’s picture flashing on the screen, indicating his request for a voice call. He doesn’t hear an answer right away but rather a loud _thump!_ from the other line as though the phone has been dropped. Michael looks down at the screen to see if their call has been disconnected but when it apparently has not, he brings it back to his ear.

“Rich?”

 _“Oh… sorry, dude.”_ Rich finally speaks up, sounding oddly giddy.

“What’s wrong?”

_“Nothing! Why?”_

Michael’s brows furrow in incredulity as he rubs the sleep out of his eyes. “Uh, because you called me at two in the morning? What are you even doing still up this late?”

Rich laughs, still sounding giddier than ever. _“Shouldn’t I be asking you that question too?”_

Michael groggily sits up, now recognizing the tone in his boyfriend’s voice. “Are you drunk, man?”

He hears Rich snickering-- or more like giggling-- from the other line and while Michael is quite amused that the blond somehow thought it would be a good idea to call him in his current state, he still couldn’t help but wonder why he’s even drinking on a school night. He should know better than that. But before Michael could even have the opportunity to point that out, another voice comes in and he suddenly feels his entire frame tensing up at the sound of the familiar high-pitched voice.

 _“Michael!”_ Brooke sings into the line before laughing, sounding just as intoxicated as Rich is. _“You should totally like… like come over here!”_

“Come over?” Michael frowns. “What-- where are you guys?”

_“At the school’s football field! We’re having the time of our lives, Poindexter!”_

Michael doesn’t find this amusing anymore. He doesn’t normally care where Rich goes off to hang out with his friends but the thought of them trespassing sounds way too big of an issue for them to get out of. And to make things worse, they’re _drinking._ “Brooke, can I talk to Rich?” He asks patiently, pinching the bridge of his nose in slight annoyance.

Brooke cackles and hoots, although clearly not at Michael. _“Oh sorry, Rich is too busy roughhousing with Jake right now-- Oh my god, you two should be more careful!”_ She then laughs obnoxiously like her voice of caution was only stated as an obligation and not as a genuine concern.

“Brooke?” He sighs, but Brooke just laughs at something. “Brooke, dudette? Hello?”

Fortunately, Rich’s voice comes back. _“Babe, you should come to school! This place is huuuuuuge!”_

“You’re only noticing that now?” Michael shakes his head as he stands up from his bed and reaches for his hoodie that has been abandoned on his beanbag chair. “Listen, I’m going over there and I’m picking you up. Don’t go anywhere else, yeah?”

_“Huh? You mean you’re comin’ here?”_

“Only to pick you up.”

_“That’s more like it! C’mon then, we have enough drinks for everybody!”_

Michael slaps his forehead in disbelief before pinning his phone between his ear and his shoulder then grabs for his jeans from the floor. “I said I’m coming over to pick you up. I don’t wanna drink at school.”

But just as he thought, Rich isn’t even paying attention. _“Hey guys, Michael’s coming over!”_

Michael groans in sheer annoyance and hangs up.

* * *

Climbing over the school fence has proven to require more effort than he had counted on. He just hopes his mom won’t notice the torn fabric of his jeans-- she knows he’s not exactly into any physical activities that would have resulted to him going home in damaged denim. There’s no doubt that Rich and his friends got past this area without a damn hitch like the physically fit people that they are. Video games make things look so much easier.

As he nears the football field, he spots the usual gang-- Jake, Chloe, Brooke, and Rich. They all brought their own battery-powered lanterns and are just fooling around. Just as Brooke had mentioned earlier, Jake and Rich are back to roughhousing while the two girls just cackle and chug on their beer.

Has this always been a normal thing for them?

Because if it is, Michael couldn’t help but feel rather hesitant about what he’s ought to do. As much as his boyfriend’s friends annoy the shit out of him, there’s still a tiny glimmer of hope inside him that longs for their praise in a way. They are Rich’s best friends after all. He’s in good terms with all of them but he can’t stop that nagging insecurity telling him about how they still probably believe that Rich could do way better.

And maybe he can.

So what is he gonna do if Rich begins to realize that too?

Michael lingers by the entrance, his fingers coming up to rest on the wall beside him. If he shows up and tries to get Rich home, then he will certainly be seen as a stick in the mud. But if he just lets him be, there’s still that terrifying chance that they’ll get caught and that could land unfavorable circumstances on Rich’s permanent record. He can’t let that happen-- especially now that this is their last year in high school.

He jumps when he suddenly feels his phone vibrating in the pocket of his hoodie. He instinctively fishes it out and answers the call just after realizing that it’s coming from the blond himself. But just before he could utter a word, he looks up just in time to find Rich being pinned down to the grass by Jake and he realizes that he must have been pocket dialed. He shakes his head at that and is just about to hang up when he suddenly hears Chloe’s voice from the other line.

“You two are such kids! Break it up!” He sees the brunette walking over to the two and smacking her boyfriend at the back of his head.

Jake doesn’t even flinch but laughs. “Not until this dude admits that he’s a pansy!”

“Oh for the love of-- just admit you’re a pansy, Rich.” Chloe coaxes.

Brooke says something but Michael doesn’t hear her clearly considering how she’s standing a bit far from the rest.

“Because he’s been a pansy lately!” Jake hollers his answer to Brooke’s unheard question and Michael hears Rich grunt underneath the quarterback.

“Dude, just get off of me!” He tries to wriggle his wrists out of his best friend’s hold but fails.

“Nope, not until you admit it.” Jake clicks his tongue and shakes his head. “Come on, man. I’m sure you’ve noticed how much of a spoilsport you’ve been since you started dating Michael.”

Michael tenses up and feels his heart skip a beat at the mention of his name. He quickly takes a step back just to ensure that he won’t be seen at all. He could still hear Rich grunting from probably trying to break free but then he sighs and Michael sees his body ease down. He grows silent and Michael hears Brooke saying something muffled again, but that’s not what he’s worried about; it’s the fact that Rich couldn’t even give an answer is what’s making him hold his breath.

“Don’t be in denial, Brooke,” Chloe says with a dismissive wave of her hand. “Remember when he skipped out on your family’s Super Bowl Sunday house party just because Michael’s family went out for the day and he wanted that opportunity to be alone in the house with him? We _never_ skip out on your family’s parties! No matter how uncomfortably drunk your mom gets.”

“And remember when he agreed that he’s going to dress up as Eggsy and I was going to be Harry from Kingsman for Jenna’s costume party but then he canceled on me to do a couples costume with Michael instead?” Jake adds, but he doesn’t sound necessarily bitter about it.

“Oh yes, I remember that.” Chloe groans in what sounds like disappointment. “You would have made such a _hot_ Harry, baby.”

Michael looks away just as he realizes Chloe has bent down to kiss Jake who is still apparently on top of Rich. He has no idea Rich has been canceling on his friends to hang out with him. Why though? It’s not like he ever actually stops him from going out with them so why is the blond calling off the things he generally enjoys doing just for the sake of doing _his_ interests instead? It just doesn’t make sense. And to make matters worse, now he’s coming off as the kind of toxic boyfriend who keeps his partner from ever going out at all unless they’re together.

“Okay, okay, this isn’t funny anymore.” Rich finally says, obviously trying his very best to make his tone as light as possible. Michael immediately looks up to find him making an attempt to nudge Jake away. “Now get off of me, man. You being on top of me for this long kinda makes you suspicious, don't you think?”

Silence lingers after the blond’s words but Michael got it as soon as he said it and he couldn’t help but stifle a laugh in spite of the emotional qualms he’s having, his hand coming up to cover his mouth. After another second or two, Jake visibly cringes and is quick to get back up on his feet.

“Dude! Don’t even joke about that! I’m not gay! I thought we’re past that!” He recoils in disgust while Chloe just laughs at him.

“Relax, princess.” Michael could hear Rich rolling his eyes through his tone. The blond then turns to Brooke once he's back on his feet. “Do you still have any beer left?”

Brooke’s words are incoherent as always but she’s shaking her head which clearly indicates her answer.

“Lame.” Rich shrugs. “I’m out.”

“Wait, isn’t Michael coming?” Chloe tugs on Rich’s arm.

“Pssh, you obviously don’t want him around.” Rich yanks himself away from her hold, stumbling a bit on his steps in his drunken stupor. “I’ll just… I dunno, call him to pick me up somewhere.”

The three exchange glances, then Jake is the first to speak up. “Hey man, are you pissed at us? Because we were just totally joking about the whole Michael problem.”

“ _Michael problem?_ ” Rich turns to face him. “What, so he really is a fucking problem to you guys?”

“Of course we don’t mean it like that.” Brooke walks closer to him, her hands folded together over her skirt. “We just think you’ve… changed since you started dating him. We like Michael. He’s a great and funny guy but…”

“...we just don’t think he’s the right one for you.” Chloe finishes for her, though she sounds more impatient than concerned if anything. “Look how long it took us just to convince you to come out here drinking with us! I couldn’t even believe my fucking ears when you were so worried about it being a ‘school night’. Like, what the actual fuck?”

“Yeah…” Jake nods reluctantly. “You’re kinda lame now, and I’m just being real with you because you’re my best friend but I think Michael is holding you back from having a really great senior year with m-- erm, _us_.”

“Can’t you just like, I dunno, go back to dating Brooke? You two are cute together anyway.” Chloe gestures to Brooke who jumps in surprise.

“C-Chloe…!”

“What?” Chloe shrugs. “I’m just telling it like it is!”

Rich grows silent for a moment and Michael looks away as he considers hanging up. He doesn’t want to hear any more of this and he certainly doesn’t want to hear Rich’s response. He has been dreading this moment, and it turns out to be more inevitable than he thought. And what’s worse is that he’s here to witness it-- to witness Richard Goranski realizing that he could do so much better than him. Michael breathes in slowly, his insides feeling ragged and tight. He knows that whatever Rich is going to say next, it will break him. And he’s not ready for that.

“You know…” Rich finally breaks the silence. “...you guys really suck.”

Michael looks up, feeling his body stiffen at the remark. Rich’s entire build looks rigid as if he’s holding back from lashing out on his friends.

“Rich--” Jake begins.

“No, Jake. I don’t wanna hear it.” Rich turns to him sharply. “Haven’t you ever thought that maybe I didn’t change at all? That maybe I’m behaving the way I _normally_ am because my goddamn SQUIP is no longer here to tell me that I should be at your beck and call every fucking time? ‘Cause shit, I guess you guys don’t like the real me after all. But do you know who does? Michael. _My boyfriend._ And I really, _really_ like him. If you can’t live with that, then you can die mad about it. So Jake, fuck you.”

He turns to Chloe. “And fuck you.”

Then to Brooke. “And--” He suddenly stops for a second before sighing. “I’m sorry.”

Brooke shakes her head, a sad smile on her lips. “It’s okay…”

Michael takes a sharp intake of breath, his boyfriend’s words running through his mind over and over again. He could feel his heart racing and his face warming up as a crazy tingling sensation brushes his skin. Rich’s response really took him by surprise and now he can't help the woozy feeling of delight and anxiety churning inside him.

“You know what,” Chloe immediately storms towards Rich, stopping short just when she reaches the close distance that she wants. “you don’t get to treat Jake like that because in case you’ve forgotten, he broke his fucking legs saving your sorry ass! And we _accepted_ you for being bi so you should be more grateful for our tolerance! Don’t be acting all high and mighty here! And if you like being yourself so much, then why the _hell_ are you still holding back from talking with your lisp all this time, huh?”

Rich stares at her for a second or two. “Fine then.” He shrugs his shoulders. Then he leans in a bit closer to the brunette. “Chloe Valentine, you can thuck my bithexual dick.”

Chloe suddenly screams in frustration and throws her arms up to bat at him but Jake is quick to grab her away by the waist. “Let go of me! I’m going to bash his fucking skull in!”

Rich shakes his head and turns to leave.

But then his eyes meet Michael’s and he stops.

As if noticing his tensed build, his friends pause as well and follow his gaze.

Now Michael feels a bit ridiculous standing there, being caught watching them. Awkwardly, he waves his phone a bit in the air and after seemingly taking the hint, Rich immediately takes his phone out from his pocket and looks down at the screen.

“Shit.”

“Did he hear…” Brooke’s voice fades.

Rich doesn’t respond and presses his phone against his ear instead.

“...hey.” He says, his voice clearer than earlier.

Michael swallows. “H-Hey.”

“How… How long have you been--”

“For a while now.”

“Oh…”

“Do you… want a ride?”

Rich looks back at his friends for half a second before looking back at him. “Okay.”

* * *

Michael pulls his dad’s car over and turns the engine off when they finally made it in front of his house.

They didn’t say much amid the duration of the ride. Michael knows that Rich doesn’t have to tell him to know that he wants to stay over at his place for the night (or morning, rather) since he still doesn’t want him to know where he lives which isn’t that much of a problem to him anymore. Every time he would steal a glance at him though, he would see him either fiddling with his seatbelt and chewing on his bottom lip or taking desperate gulps from the bottled water Michael had brought along for him. Michael doesn’t exactly know what the guy’s so nervous and quiet about when he didn’t really say anything that could spark an argument between them.

Unless…

...he’s having second thoughts.

What if he’s regretting the things he said?

What he did earlier could have most likely cost him the only people in school he genuinely enjoys hanging out with. Are they really worth losing just for some anti-social stoner?

Is Rich going to break up with him?

Michael tightens his grip on the steering wheel as an overwhelming wave of fear and anxiety washes over him, pulling him down and drowning him in a sea of intense distress.

Rich is going to break up with him and he’s in no position to stop him. Why should he? Rich could go back to dating Brooke and they’ll be seen as the power couple of the school alongside Jake and Chloe. They could go to prom together and people wouldn’t look at them funny. They could even win Prom King and Prom Queen and everyone will cheer and praise about how perfect they look together. Brooke will even probably let him sleep with her which is obviously something Rich has been deprived off ever since he started dating him. He could lead a normal problem-free life if he chooses to date a girl instead-- and not just any girl but one of the most popular ones too. Brooke still clearly likes him after all. It wouldn’t make sense if Rich passes up on that commonly sought-after opportunity.

And then what?

 _What will happen to me,_ Michael thinks. He couldn’t imagine himself being with anyone else but Rich. It’ll be too hard and too painful for him to handle. Just the thought of seeing Rich in the halls with his arms around Brooke, no longer giving him those loving grins… it’s too much.

At the corner of his eye, he sees Rich squirming on his seat. “Michael--”

“Please don’t break up with me.” The words are out of his mouth before he could even give it some time to think it over.

Rich is quiet at first. “What?”

Michael keeps his eyes on the steering wheel, his knuckles nearly white from his grip. “Please… Please don’t break up with me. I’ll do anything. I-I’ll... I don’t know-- I can’t-- I just…” He knows that he looks pathetic and desperate but he couldn’t stop himself. It’s selfish, but he can't stand the mere thought of losing Rich. All of a sudden, he finds it hard to catch his breath. His heart pounds painfully in his chest and he hears Rich saying something but his mind couldn’t properly digest the words he’s telling him. He grips both sides of his head and lets out a low whine, feeling his surroundings spin around him. The car feels too small now. He needs to get out or he won’t be able to breathe.

Frantic, he unlocks his seatbelt and gets out of the vehicle as fast he could. He drops down to his knees on the front lawn as his entire body trembles and cold sweat runs down his forehead. He grips his chest over his hoodie and tries his very best to catch his breathing but to no avail.

Shit, he’s having another panic attack.

He had his first one last year at Jake’s party and he thought that it was going to be a one-time thing but apparently, he thought wrong.

“Michael! Look at me!”

He only realizes now that Rich is knelt down right in front of him, cupping his face between his hands.

“Rich…” Michael tries to focus on him as he brings his hand up to press it against his boyfriend’s.

“Yeah, that’s right. I’m here.” Rich says softly before leaning in to press a gentle kiss on his forehead. “Just breathe slowly, yeah? Here, breathe in.” Just as he sees the blond carefully breathing in, Michael swallows and does the same. “And breathe out.” He then exhales along with him. They do this for a few minutes, syncing their breaths and focusing in each other’s eyes.

Until finally, Michael could feel his muscles easing down and his heartbeat slowly going steady.

“You okay?” Rich asks, his hand trailing down to rest it on Michael’s nape. Michael lets out a relieved sigh and nods before leaning in to press their foreheads together, closing his eyes.

“Thanks.”

“No problem.”

They stay still for a few more seconds and as always, the silence hovering over them doesn’t bring the slightest discomfort. Rich eventually pulls back and caresses Michael’s jaw, his thumb gently running over his cheek as his eyes search his face. Michael notices a small loving smile gracing his lips and the sudden urge to kiss him is almost too hard for him to resist.

“I wasn’t planning on breaking up with you.” Rich tells him. “I don’t even know why you would think that. That would have been the dumbest decision ever.”

Michael blinks. “...really?”

“Yeah, dude!” Rich laughs softly. “How long were you at school earlier? Didn't you hear what I said?”

Feeling a tad bit self-conscious now, Michael pulls away and sits back on his legs. “I did…”

“Then shouldn’t have that proven how much I want to be with you?”

“Ugh,” Michael looks away, heat rising up his cheeks. “do you really have to phrase it like that?”

Rich laughs again before leaning in to kiss him on the lips, his hand coming up to gently push Michael down on his back against the grass. Michael easily lets him though, returning the kiss with as much relief and adoration as he could give. He can’t believe he had let his paranoia get the better of him. Rich has proven how much he likes him time after time and yet he still has this twinge of stinging doubt implanted inside of him. He’s not sure how long it’ll linger there or if it will ever leave him alone at all but perhaps that’s another problem for another day.

He then feels Rich pulling back a bit from the kiss and looking down at him, a small smile still adorning his lips and his thumb stroking Michael’s cheek.

Michael smiles back at him, slightly flustered. “What?”

Rich doesn’t answer right away. But when he did, it immediately ignites a fluttering sensation inside Michael’s stomach.

“I really like you.”

Michael chuckles a bit in embarrassment. “I really like you too.”

Rich grins before giving him a quick peck on the lips. “Honestly? I thought you were the one who’s going to break up with me.”

“Wait, what?” Michael laughs at the assumption and carefully nudges the blond off of him so he could sit up.  

Rich looks admittedly embarrassed but he’s still grinning anyway as he sits down on the grass beside him. “It’s true. I wasn’t sure how much you heard back there but I was afraid that you heard what they said about you keeping me from hanging out with them. I thought you might dump me just so I don’t lose my friends.”

“O-Oh…” Michael looks away, guilty for the fact that he had assumed earlier that Rich would be so much happier with his friends than with him. He brings his legs up and crosses his arms over his knees, resting his chin on top. “I don’t want you losing your friends over me though. That fight you had with them earlier…”

“That’s nothin’.” Rich waves it off. “I’ve had bigger fights with Jake before. This one will blow over.”

“You’ve had fights bigger than this one?” Michael turns his head to the side to look at Rich. “Seriously?”

“Yeah.” Rich shrugs with a chuckle. “Have I ever told you that he was bi-curious at one point?”

Michael pauses for a second before narrowing his eyes at him with interest. “Go on.”

“Well, before I dated you…” Rich rubs the back of his neck, seemingly embarrassed. “...we kinda did stuff.”

“ _Stuff?_ Like what?”

“You know! Stuff!” Rich waves his hand around as if that’s good enough of a clarification.

“No, I _don’t_ know.” Michael shakes his head, though he’s getting amused by this. “What kind of stuff are we talking about here? Is it something that _we_ haven’t done yet?”

“Technically, we haven’t done anything at all so--”

“Ah, so it _does_ have something to do with the classic touching of the ol’ nether regions.”

“Oh my god, don't say it like that.” Rich runs his hand over his now flushed face. “Pleeeaase.”

Michael laughs and gives him a pat on the back. “Yeah, okay, sure. But is that what you dudes fought about?”

Rich nods. “Mhm. We did that ‘stuff’ for a while-- but only because he was just trying to figure himself out. But anyway, there was that one time where I sorta…” He scratches the back of his head and looks away. Michael leans in to get a better look at his expression but judging by how the shade of red had traveled down to the blond’s neck, he could tell how flustered he is just by thinking about it.

“You sorta what?” He coaxes curiously.

Rich clears his throat. “...calledyournameout.”

Michael blinks. “What? Dude, I didn’t catch that.”

“Ugh…” Rich groans as he slides his hand over his face. “I said I called… your name out…”

“My name?”

“Y-Yeah…” Rich starts picking at the grass, still avoiding eye contact. “Right when I reached… you know…”

“Oh.” Michael thinks it over. Then it hits him. “ _O-Oh._ ”

“Yep.” Rich smacks his lips awkwardly. “After that, he just started freaking out on me and up to this day he never really explained why. He just got really pissy but I could tell it’s because he thought I was imagining a chick touching me instead just like he was. I guess that would have made him more comfortable. But then after being reminded that I like dudes as well, I guess shit got too real for him and he reeled right back to being the straight dude that he is.”

Michael furrows his brows in incredulity at his boyfriend’s assumption. Even if that was the case, he highly doubts that would have elicited such an impassioned reaction out of Jake. “Uh, Rich. I don’t think--” He quickly cuts his words short after thinking it through. It’s not exactly his place or his feelings to say the obvious, so maybe he should just leave that to Jake himself. Somehow, he’s not too worried about it. At least not anymore. Instead, he just sighs and rests his head against Rich’s shoulder.

“As long as you’re sure you’ll be on good terms with him, then I guess everything will work out. Just don’t cancel on them in favor of hanging out with me next time. If you have plans, just say so.” He closes his eyes and moves his arm to hook it with his boyfriend’s.

He feels Rich moving against him to plant a kiss on top of his head. “Yeah, but we do the same stupid shit. It got old pretty fast. At least I get to learn new stuff from you…” He then pauses as though he's mulling it over. “But yeah, I guess that's not really fair to Jake and Brooke. I don't give a fuck about Chloe.”

“Good. You shouldn't. Just… make it up with Jake soon.”

“You’ve got nothing to worry about.” Michael feels Rich’s fingers locking with his. “Sorry I had to make you pick me up this late in the night.”

Michael shakes his head and takes in a comforting breath of the cold evening air.

“It’s okay. I couldn’t sleep anyway.”

 

# 16\. “You’re warm.”

 _“Kuya_ , can you put these over there?” Micah requests as he hands his brother three candy canes and points at a certain part of the tree that he can’t reach. Michael does so without question and Rich could see why. Micah is the artist here after all and it only makes sense why he was assigned by their dad to be the ‘creative director’ of the Christmas tree.

While the tree has already been up and decorated since the start of November, it looks like the younger Mell still has a few ideas running in his mind because now he wouldn’t stop rearranging the ornaments from here to there. Nevertheless, the tree looks absolutely magnificent that it’s hard to believe it was decorated by a kid. Five oversized stockings are neatly lined up over the fireplace with glowing fairy lights draped over them. Strangely enough, Michael and his family don’t stuff the stockings with presents like most people do. They just like to hang them there for the aesthetic.

Another thing they do out of the American norm is that they don’t celebrate Christmas on the 25th. They celebrate it on the 24th-- Christmas Eve, or _Nochebuena_ as they call it. Nearly all of their relatives have gathered to their house to have an enormous traditional family feast. Afterward, they’d proceed to hand out presents to each other and open them on the very same night instead of waiting for the morning after. It’s a custom that Rich is clearly not familiar with but being here to experience all of that now does feel homier than how he usually used to do it with his family.

“Are you and dad done with the roasted pig?” Michael asks him just as he’s finished hanging the candy canes on the tree.

Rich looks up from the cup of hot chocolate he’s drinking and nods his head. “Oh, yeah. It was a piece of cake.”

“You got along with him?” Michael joins him on the couch and reaches for the cup from Rich’s hand to take a sip.

Rich gives him a look of disbelief, though a small smile still creeps up his lips. “It’s not like I haven’t met him before.”

“Yeah, but that was the first time you were _alone_ with him.” Michael shrugs as he hands him back his drink. “I was afraid he might give you the classic ‘take care of my son’ kind of talk. He literally did that to Jeremy back in sophomore year. He completely misinterpreted our relationship at the time just because he found us passed out and half-naked in the basement. Jeremy was fucking horrified.”

“Wait…” Rich narrows his eyes at him half-suspiciously. “...why _were_ you two half-naked to begin with?”

“It was summer, man! It was as hot as Satan’s anus and Micah broke the AC. We just decided to get high and ended up falling asleep.”

“For the last time, I didn’t break anything. You just like using my name because you know dad can’t get mad at me.” Micah grumbles before taking the box of Christmas trinkets into his arms and climbing up the stairs to probably put it back in the attic.

“Well anyway,” Michael just waves him off. “how was it? Roasting a pig with my dad?”

Rich sets the cup down on the coffee table. “He definitely didn’t give me ‘the talk’. He just asked me about my plans after high school and if I will go visit you every now and then at Princeton.”

Michael rolls his eyes. “Geez, I haven’t even gotten in yet and he’s already so confident about that.”

Rich grins at him and nudges his shoulder. “Oh come on, he’s just proud of you. I mean, _I_ know you’ll get into Princeton. You’re so fucking smart, I don’t even know why you’re still in high school. You should’ve skipped a couple of grades already.”

“True.” Michael feigns a thoughtful look as he taps his chin. “If I skipped a few grades, I wouldn’t even be dating you right now. I’d probably be dating a future doctor or a future lawyer.”

“Yeah, and they’d probably bore you to submission.” Rich snorts a laugh. “Your relationship with them would be so fucking bland that you’ll have no choice but to just sleep with them in hopes of getting a reaction out of them.”

“As long as they have money, then sure. Why not?”

“Oh god, am I dating an escort?”

Michael laughs and lightly punches the blond’s arm. “Screw you, man.”

Rich just grins and throws his arm over his boyfriend’s shoulders to pull him in and plant a kiss on his cheek. Even though he’s aware that they’re just joking around, he still couldn’t help that twinge of insecurity pulling at his strings just by the mere thought of Michael finding someone who could have a future brighter than his.

_No, don’t think about that right now._

“Where’s your family?” A little girl suddenly comes in and heaves herself up to Michael’s lap, her big brown eyes staring up at Rich with genuine curiosity. Rich quickly draws his arm away from his boyfriend.

“Ah-- Reyna!” Michael tries to shush her but Rich just grins and pats his knee to let him know that it’s okay.

“It’s cool.” He then directs his eyes at Reyna who is clearly one of Michael’s cousins. “My dad got invited to serve as the pastor at some church tonight so he couldn’t be here.”

Michael blinks. “He’s a pastor again?”

“Nah,” Rich shakes his head. “the community just really likes and misses him so they invited him for one last counseling or teaching or whatever the hell pastors do.”

Reyna gasps, her hands flying up to her lips. “You just said the H-word!”

“Oh shit, sorry.”

“S-word!”

“Hey,” Michael lightly swats Rich’s arm. “watch your fucking mouth. Who knows what Reyna could pick up from you?”

“The F-word!” Reyna gasps for the last time before hopping off of her cousin and scampering away to probably tell on them. Rich shares a look with Michael, then they both just burst out laughing. They know for a fact that the adults are gonna let them get away with this one simply because it’s Christmas.

“More room for us.” Rich is about to plant another kiss on Michael’s cheek until Michael nudges him away.

“You’re touchier than usual.” The brunet points out. “What’s going on, what did you do?”

“Am I not allowed to touch my boyfriend?” Rich pouts at him like a kid who has just been told he’s not allowed to open any of his presents yet.

“Some of my relatives keep looking at us.”

Rich moves closer. “They’re just jealous that you’ve got a hot guy for a boyfriend.”

Michael snorts a laugh. “Yeah, that _must_ be it.”

“Can I kiss you now?”

“Nah.”

“Come on!”

“Dude! I just told you my relatives keep looking at us!”

“So what? I literally just saw your Aunt Marisol sucking faces with her third husband near the bathroom upstairs earlier. What we’re doing is pretty fucking innocent compared to where her hand was an hour ago.”

“How did you know that’s her third husband?”

“Your aunts really love to gossip. Now come oooon.” Rich tries to lean in again but Michael just lightly nudges him off much to his dismay. He’s not even asking for a full-on make-out session. A peck on the lips is enough for him to get through the night with these old people looking at him like he’s some fascinating homosexual artifact. As much as their stares piss him off, he could still somehow understand why they seem a bit uncomfortable by his presence. Michael has never brought a date with him to their _nochebuenas_ , and most of them have hoped that he would eventually bring a girl.

Nevertheless, it wouldn’t kill them to _try_ to be subtle with their gawking.

“Have you ever heard of personal space?” MIchael asks him after another attempt of nudging the blond off. He doesn’t sound uncomfortable though.

Rich shakes his head. “It’s cold, and you’re warm. C’mon, man. Just _one_ kiss. Then I’ll leave you alone.”

“You’re hopeless.”

“What can I say? Love can do stupid shit to guys like me.”

Now _that_ seems to embarrass Michael a lot because he’s quick to look around as if he’s worried over whether or not someone might have heard him. After making sure that the coast is clear, he immediately swats Rich’s arm-- his face completely beet red and his lips tightly pressed together in a suppressed, giddy smile.

“Not so loud!” He says in a hushed voice, but the excitement in his voice doesn’t go unnoticed.

_God, he’s so cute._

“Fine.” Rich puts his hands up in surrender. “Just give me a kiss and I’ll keep quiet.”

Michael seems to ponder on this. He even taps his finger on his chin for added effect and Rich couldn’t help but roll his eyes at this. “Duuuude, I’m just asking for a kiss. It’s not like I want you to--”

His whine is immediately cut off the very second Michael leans in and presses his lips against his.

The fluttering feeling in his stomach comes rushing back as Rich instinctively closes his eyes and is just about to kiss back when the other breaks the contact. He refuses to let him end it just like that though. Before Michael could fully pull back, the blond tugs him by the collar of his shirt and takes his lips with his again for that much-needed spark traveling around his entire frame. He feels Michael smiling in their kiss and that’s good enough of a sign to show him that he’s feeling just as elated by this as he is.

After a dizzying moment, Rich pulls back and his eyes meet Michael’s.

They both smile at each other.

But of course, every magical Christmas moment has to end.

Micah’s voice breaks the spell.

“Ugh.” The kid says from the bottom of the stairs, a childish, disgusted frown curling his lips. “At least wait for mom to hang the mistletoe, you horny bastards.”

 _“Micah! I heard that!”_ Mrs. Mell’s furious voice booms from the kitchen which in turn causes the youngest Mell to wince in fear.

“Yikes.” Rich laughs, finally giving Michael the space that he wants.

“Nice going, pottymouth.” Michael grins at his brother. Much to Rich’s surprise, he takes his hand in his and rests them on his thigh.

Micah’s face turns red and doesn’t say another word as he rushes to the kitchen, not giving the pair a glance.

 

# 17\. “You didn’t have to ask.”

“Want some?”

Rich turns to find Jake offering him a drink from his stainless thermos and judging by the smirk dangling on his friend’s lips, he could already tell that it contains alcohol rather than coffee. He arches a brow at the taller jock and shakes his head. “Uhh, you do know they’ll carry out an inspection of our drinks later in the bus, right?”

Jake shrugs, unbothered. “Yeah, but who’s going to do the inspection?” He points at himself smugly. “The student council! As president, I’m practically invincible. So here, drink to your heart’s content.”

“Pass.” Rich gently pushes the thermos away from his direction before taking a quick gander of his surroundings in hopes of seeing a certain bespectacled nerd. “If Michael smells it on me, he probably wouldn’t want to sit with me throughout the ride.”

“What-- I thought _we’re_ gonna be bus buddies?”

“Huh?” Rich redirects his gaze back at his friend. “I don’t… remember committing to that. Besides, aren’t you sitting with Chloe?”

“Oh yeah, that.” Jake scoffs and takes another sip from his drink. “Nah, I broke up with her last night. She’s still really pissed at you and had the gall to say that she can’t ‘allow’ me to hang out with you. Whatever, screw it.”

Rich could only make a _pfft_ sound, knowing that Jake and Chloe will go back to dry humping against each other sooner or later. He remembers how Jake used to be so devastated every time they broke up but now it’s just a regular thing they do. They both obviously know they’ll get back together soon enough which explains the lack of emotional distress in their recent break up’s. Rich is just glad he doesn’t have to go through all that shit with Michael.

“But enough about Chloe. I want us to sit together, dude.” Jake nudges his shoulder in a clear attempt of snatching his attention again. “This is our last year in high school and you’ve been spending it a lot with Michael. It’s not like he’s going anywhere after graduation.”

“He is, actually.” Rich grumbles somewhat bitterly as he rubs his hands together to gather some warmth from the crisp early morning air. “He got into Stanford.” Michael had told him just the other night and they celebrated his acceptance letter with the rest of his family. As proud as Rich feels for him, he knows that it’s perfectly normal for him to also dread for the day Michael will have to leave for Stanford. He wouldn’t even stick around for the summer because he thinks it’s for the best if he could get there as early as possible after graduation so he could familiarize himself with the buildings. Now their days together are extremely limited.

“Really? Shit, that’s huge.” Jake comments, seemingly impressed. “I thought he was aiming for Princeton?”

“He was, but only because he didn’t think he’d get into Stanford.” Rich wouldn’t have even minded if Michael chose Princeton instead. Not only will the guy get to go with Jake and perhaps finally grow some kind of bond with him, but Princeton is still in New Jersey so he's not that far off.

Rich had also just received his acceptance letter from a community college which wasn’t that big of a surprise for him since he doesn’t exactly have the money to afford to go anywhere else. At least not yet.

“Well… I’ll still be around if that helps?” Jake tries rather sheepishly.

Rich smiles at him and nods. “Yeah.”

_“Wait, so you’re literally telling me that Steve Buscemi wasn’t always old?”_

Rich catches on Jeremy’s voice and he stands straighter right away, knowing that where Jeremy goes, Michael is there as well. He turns around in search for the two and just as he does, he finds them sharing a thermos together as they make their way towards him.

“Hey.” Rich grins at Michael, leaning in to give him a kiss on the cheek.

“Top of the mornin’ to ya, laddies.” Michael greets back in an exaggerated Irish accent before taking the thermos from Jeremy’s grip to take another sip.

“Aren’t we missing one?” Jake points out, narrowing his eyes as he scans their surroundings before settling his gaze on Jeremy. “Dude, where’s Christine?”

“She couldn’t make it.” Jeremy frowns in genuine disappointment. “She caught the flu last night.”

“Wait a tic,” Michael abruptly pulls the thermos away from his lips and stares at his best friend in sheer suspicion. “you didn’t make out with her last night, did you? Because if you did and you’re sharing your drink with me…”

“No!” Jeremy immediately shakes his head, offended. “She wouldn’t even let me into her room last night. She doesn’t want me catching it either. And even if I did, I wouldn’t have offered my drink to you.”

“Ugh,” Rich grimaces. “so you mean to tell me that if I kiss my boyfriend today, that would be the same as kissing Jeremy Heere?”

“Don’t knock it ‘till you try it.” Michael wiggles his shoulders at the blond teasingly. “C’mon, _‘boyfriend’_. Pucker up.”

“What’s that supposed to mean-- gyah! Dude!” Rich immediately claps his hands down on Michael’s shoulders to keep him away the very second Michael tries to kiss him on the lips playfully. Michael is persistent though as he yanks the blond’s hand off of his shoulder and goes in for the kill, planting a big one on his lips. He hears Jake hollering with laughter while Jeremy snickers. Horrified, he just stares up at Michael’s grinning face.

Michael then pats his cheek. “Congratulations, my good man. You’ve officially kissed Jeremy Heere.”

Rich recoils and grimaces at him. “Why am I dating you?”

“Health benefits?”

“Dillinger, time to do the count.” Mrs. Duke interrupts them with a clipboard in hand. She stops for a beat after catching Michael being at too close of a distance with Rich and as though realizing this, Michael immediately pulls away from the blond and moves to stand next to Jeremy. Contented, Mrs. Duke focuses back on Jake and hands him the clipboard. “Go and make sure the rest of your classmates are here so we can get a move on.” She then turns to the others. “You three, go take your seats on the bus right now.”

“You heard the lady.” Jake gestures to the bus. “I gotta do some president stuff because that’s what important people do.”

“Show off.” Rich snickers, bumping his best friend on the shoulder as he passes by.

He then slings the strap of his backpack over his shoulder before glancing at Michael who has caught up to him with Jeremy by his side. “So dude, we’re sitting on the bus together, right?”

“Huh?” Michael gives him an incredulous look. “I don’t remember us talking about that.”

This puts an abrupt pause to Rich’s steps and he holds onto Michael’s elbow. “Wait, we don’t _have_ to talk about it. It’s already a given because we’re dating.”

“Sorry, man.” Michael brushes his hand away with a shrug. “Why don’t you just sit with Jake?”

“E-Erm, Michael…” Jeremy hesitantly butts in. “It’s okay if Rich wants to sit with you. I can always sit at the back.”

“Problem solved!” Rich grins, but then he earns a smack on his arm from Michael. “Ow! What the hell?”

Michael ignores him and turns his head towards his best friend instead. “I’m not gonna let you just sit at the back, buddy. Besides, my ma made your favorite snacks. It’d be a waste not to share it with you.” He then turns back to Rich with a stern look. “Just go and sit with Jake. I’m pretty sure he’s looking forward to spending majority of this trip with you anyway.”

Rich blinks. “You knew that he broke up with Chloe?”

“Huh? They broke up?”

_“What part of ‘go take your seats in the bus’ don’t you boys understand?”_

Mrs. Duke comes waltzing in with an unimpressed scowl curling her lips. “If I don’t see your asses on those seats in five seconds, I will--”

“See ya!” Michael briskly leans in to give Rich a peck on the cheek before grabbing Jeremy’s hand and tugging him with him to the bus, leaving the blond with the stringent teacher. Rich could already feel the warm flush of his face at the fleeting affectionate gesture of his boyfriend but upon remembering that he’s not exactly alone, he awkwardly glances at Mrs. Duke who still doesn’t look very impressed.

The old woman looks back at him through her thick glasses. “What in the world does he see in you?”

Rich shrugs, somehow finding himself agreeing with her. “Beats me.”

* * *

“What the fuck?” Rich hears Jake mutter heatedly and he looks away from the window to find his friend looking down at his phone-- particularly at a chat he’s having with Daniel Henderson. But before he could get an even better look, Jake immediately locks his phone and sends him a half-hearted glare.

“Maybe gimme some privacy?” The taller jock requests somewhat bitingly.

“Whoa.” Rich pulls back. “Chill.”

Jake just sighs irritably and scratches his head, looking off to the side to focus on whatever their tour guide is announcing. He has evidently dropped the subject and Rich knows better than to pry when he’s in a pissy mood. What the hell is that about? He decides to just shrug it off before taking a quick peek over his shoulder to find Michael listening to the announcements while taking a few munches from a pack of M&M’s he has in his hand. Jeremy is right beside him, seemingly focused on his phone until Michael nudges him to pay attention.

Rich frowns and leans back on his seat, still rather bitter that his own boyfriend chose to sit with someone else. He shouldn’t complain though. At least he’s with Jake, no matter how indignant the guy is right now.

“Okay, now that we’re done with that…” Their tour guide goes on as she checks the clipboard in her hands. “...let’s proceed to watch this very short tutorial video on how to entertain oneself on a long bus ride.” She fishes out a remote from her pocket and aims it at the small TV monitor above to turn it on. But what flashes on the screen is not the expected low-budget video that normally has an overly enthusiastic and aggressively asexual presenter. Instead, they see Dustin Kropp smiling at the camera with a white placard in his hands that has the word _“Hello!”_ written on it. This causes a slight buzz among the students while Rich merely keeps his eyes on the screen, curious. Dustin then drops the placard to reveal another one underneath it.

This time, it says: _“My name is Dustin Kropp and there’s someone I really like.”_

Is this dude really going to do that creepy but somehow overused so-called romantic technique to profess his love for someone? If so, then he should have brought a bucket of popcorn with him because this is gonna be good. A few teasing hoots and laughs erupt in the bus and he catches sight of the actual present Dustin grinning and shrugging off the pats his friends are giving him on his back. Looking back at the screen, Rich sees TV Dustin dropping the placard again to continue on with his message.

 _“She’s really nice and the way she smiles lights up my world.”_ The words show and Jake looks back at Rich to make an inaudible gagging action, clearly not as pissed as he was earlier. Rich snickers at that and nudges him before focusing back on the video.

_“I look forward to seeing her every day in class.”_

Next card.

_“She is like a dream I never want to wake up from.”_

Next card.

_“And now, I want to have this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to ask her...”_

Oh boy.

_“Brooke Lohst, will you go to the prom with me?”_

Right away, Rich finds his entire build freezing at the sight of the name on the final placard as a loud stir erupts among everyone around him. After hearing an eager squeal of the word _“Yes!”_ from the back, he immediately knows he doesn’t have to look to know that Brooke had accepted the promposal. Now nearly every student on the bus is cheering and celebrating with them. However, he remains still on his seat-- not finding the courage to turn and look at Brooke who has probably switched seats to sit with Dustin by now. He doesn’t even know why he’s reacting this way.

He’s not hurt. But he’s not happy either.

So why?

A tap on his shoulder brings him out of his reverie and he looks back to see Jacob Flynn leaning from his own seat and looking over at him with a condoling demeanor surfacing on his features. “Sorry about Brooke, man.”

“What?” He frowns, not even sure why he’s irritated. “Why?”

“You know…” Jacob shrugs his shoulders. “Because you two used to be a thing and all… and now she’s going to prom with someone else.”

“Yeah, and I have Michael so what’s your point here?”

“Michael? I mean, are you really--” As though just taking notice of the infuriated glare the blond is throwing at him, he flinches and shakes his head. “N-Never mind. Carry on with your business.” He says before finally leaving him alone. Rich grunts in sheer annoyance as he leans back against his seat.

 _Now_ he knows why he isn’t particularly happy about Dustin publicly asking Brooke to prom.

It’s because of people like Jacob. They will undoubtedly start looking at him as if he’s someone to take pity on for just witnessing his own ex-girlfriend get asked to prom by someone else. And to make matters worse, they clearly believe that Michael isn’t that much of an improvement from Brooke even though there’s nothing about the two to compare them with. People are going to talk shit about this because they apparently love drama as long as they’re not personally involved in it.

Shit, why does Dustin have to be such a fucking extravagant dude?

“Hey,” He feels Jake nudging his shoulder. “have you asked Michael Jacks-off to the prom yet?”

Rich hesitates before peering back over his shoulder to find his boyfriend telling something to Jeremy with so much enthusiasm and passion that the blond could already tell he’s talking about Overwatch; the only game he’s been playing since its release. Rich then looks away and shakes his head.

“Not yet. I don’t even know if he wants to go.”

“He probably didn’t before.” Jake says. “But maybe dating you changed his mind. You still have a lot of time anyway.”

“Yeah...” Rich knows for a fact that Michael has never been into the whole ‘big parties and events’ kind of thing no matter how hard he’s been trying to rise above his social anxiety, and Rich knows better than to push him into attending one. But after thinking about it more, he supposes that he wouldn’t mind not going to prom either as long as he still gets to spend that same night with Michael. Maybe they could even have a party of their own with just the two of them.

Still… it would be better to go to prom, but he will have to leave that decision to Michael.

* * *

“What the hell is that?” Rich asks in the most incredulous tone he has ever used, his eyes taking in the sight of his boyfriend from head to toe. Michael shares a confused glance with Jeremy before looking down at his own outfit which consists of a pair of red beach shorts and a white shirt that has the Hyrulian Crest printed on it. Knowing that Michael isn’t going to catch on, Rich strides towards him and tugs on his shirt. “Dude, we’re at the beach. Why do you have a shirt on?”

“True.” Jake agrees from the hammock he’s resting on. “You’ve got a nice tan, Nanny Mike-Phee. Might as well put it to good use.”

“It’s not a big deal.” Michael brushes Rich’s hand away. “Jeremy has a shirt on, so why can’t I?”

“Because Jere’s chest could literally _blind us._ ” Jake laughs at his own joke before getting flung at with a bottle of sunblock lotion by Jeremy.

“I’m not _that_ pale.” Jeremy huffs and while he may be pissy at Jake’s joke, Rich couldn’t help but look at him with an impressed grin. The guy really is starting to boost his confidence up and it certainly is nice to see him standing up for himself. Still, that doesn’t change the fact that Jake’s joke is pretty funny.

“You are pretty pale.” Michael joins in with a teasing grin. “You better apply some thick layers of sunscreen or otherwise, you’re going to fry to a crisp.”

Jeremy just flips him the bird before walking over to Jake to grab for the lotion. Unfortunately, Jake has the flawless dexterity of a basketball player and he snatches the bottle before the lanky nerd could even reach for it. He smirks at Jeremy and crosses his arms above his head, keeping the bottle in a firm grip. “I’ll give this back to you if you and your boyfriend go buy me some fries and a can of soda. It’s the least you could do after inflicting intentional pain on poor lil me.”

“W-What?!” Jeremy asks in his usual shrill disbelieving voice. “Why can’t _you_ do it?”

“It’s Michael’s fault. He mentioned fries.”

Michael arches a brow at him. “I meant ‘fry’-- as in, you know, verb.”

“Hey Rich,” Jake ignores him and grins at the blond. “think fast.”

He tosses the bottle to Rich’s direction and Jeremy reaches up for it but he’s never been good at anything _physical_ so Rich manages to catch it easily. He then glances up at Michael and Jeremy, recognizing the expectant looks on their faces as though they know he isn’t going to play along with Jake’s game and return the bottle simply because that’s what he thinks Michael would want him to do. He contemplates for a second, recalling how Michael chose Jeremy over him to sit with on the bus and how he didn’t even consider his suggestion about going shirtless.

Rich doesn’t normally like being petty, but there’s a first in everything.

He smirks and waves the bottle in his hand smugly. “You heard the prez. Go get us some snacks.”

“That’s more like it!” Jake gives him a thumbs up.

“Oh come on…” Jeremy sighs in exasperation.

Strangely enough, Michael doesn’t seem miffed. If anything, he has a knowing smile plastered on his lips as he shrugs his shoulders. “Sounds good to me. C’mon buddy.” He hooks his arm around Jeremy’s and tugs him closer. “I don’t mind spending more quality time with you anyway.”

Rich freezes as he watches the pair walk away.

“W-Wait wait wait wait!” He runs after them, blocking their path and putting his hands up in an attempt to keep them still. Jeremy looks completely bewildered by everything while Michael just looks satisfied by the blond’s reaction. Nevertheless, that doesn’t stop Rich from being pathetically clingy despite having Jake witness this. He really doesn’t give a fuck at this point-- especially now that he knows Michael won’t be sticking around for the summer. He then tosses the bottle of lotion to Jeremy who in return fumbles with it before managing to actually keep a firm grip around it.

Rich then glances at his boyfriend. “Why don’t I come along instead? Jeremy can keep Jakey D company.”

Michael shrugs and unhooks his arm from his best friend’s. “Okay, if you insist.”

“Don’t _I_ get a say--” Jeremy begins but then gets his words cut off when Jake had apparently walked over to them to sling his arm over the awkward brunet’s shoulders.

“Let’s go babe hunting then, _Jer Bear._ ” He coos teasingly, using Christine’s infamous name of endearment for Jeremy as he pinches his cheek.

“Please spare me.” Jeremy swats his hand away.

Rich grins at the two before reaching out to tug Michael by the hand. “Have fun you two. Don’t go cheating on Canigula, Jee.”

Jake snorts out a laugh. “That’s _rich_ coming from you. Heh, get it? ‘Cause your name is--”

“What?” Michael looks at Jake with a bewildered expression but Rich just hastily tugs him away from the two, mentally cursing his friend for even saying that. He knows Jake intentionally pointed that out for the fucking drama of it all and he could just only hope the jock’s statement isn’t going to last in Michael’s mind.

* * *

Apparently, he had hoped for too much.

All day, Michael wouldn’t stop bugging him about what Jake meant and no matter how many times Rich managed to steer clear of the topic, they still somehow always ended up winding back there. He told him that Jake just simply wanted to make a stupid pun but Michael-- being the smart aleck that he is-- didn’t buy it. It almost feels like the guy _wants_ him to admit something he already knows and if Michael really does know that one part of his past he’s been so regretful about, then that just gives Rich all the more reason not to want to admit it.

_“Goddammit, Michael. Just fucking drop it already. It has nothing to do with you.”_

The words he had snapped at Michael earlier ring in his head and he groans in outright frustration as he throws his arm over his eyes. What the hell was he thinking? Since when did he start letting his temper take control of his actions again? He couldn’t even tell if he had hurt Michael but judging by the way the other male had stared at him and clenched his jaw, he now knows for a fact that his boyfriend is thoroughly _pissed._

Rich sighs and sits up, picking his phone up and checking if Michael has replied to any of his messages.

Not to his surprise, he’s still being ignored.

He doubts Michael joined Jake and the rest of their classmates down at the hotel’s public pool. He’s most likely still cooped up in the room he shares with Jeremy and Dustin, probably playing with his Nintendo DS to get his mind out of their fight. Rich really wants to go out and join his friends for an awesome evening swim but just thinking about it doesn’t feel right at the moment.

He tries to call Michael’s phone again but then the line goes straight to voicemail _as always._

“Fuck it.” He scratches his head and immediately gets out of bed. He grabs his red camo jacket that Michael bought him and puts it on before storming out of his room.

* * *

“Oh, Rich.” Jeremy acknowledges him a bit uncomfortably, immediately keeping the door as close to him as possible like he’s hiding something _or someone_ in their room _._

As impatient and nervous as Rich is though, he knows better than to get snappy at Michael’s best friend.

“Hey man, is Michael there?”

Jeremy hesitantly glances back over his shoulder then looks back at him. “I dunno if that’s a good idea-- a-ah hey!”

Dustin suddenly yanks the door open from Jeremy’s grip, rolling his eyes as he does so. Without a word, he grabs the brunet by the arm and tugs him out of their hotel room but not before giving Rich a casual two-finger salute despite Jeremy’s high-pitched protests. Rich watches the pair walk away. Wow, he didn’t think he’d ever feel t _his_ relieved to have Dustin around no matter how much that guy can get in his nerves sometimes.

He looks back at the hotel room in front of him and realizes that Michael is in bed, playing with his Nintendo 3DS and turning his back to him. Rich sighs and scratches his head. He knows he should wait until Michael is ready to talk to him, but this is the longest time he’s ever avoided him and he fears that there won’t be a chance for them to talk it out at all. Quietly, he steps in and closes the door behind him.

“Michael?” He tries to call for his attention. Michael barely moves from his spot. Rich breathes in and takes a few steps closer. “Dude, we should talk about this.”

“Wow.” Michael breathes out a lackluster laugh. “Are you quoting me now? ‘Cause the last time I checked, whatever this is has nothing to do with me.”

Rich slowly sits on the bed. “Yeah, that’s my bad.”

“I’m not hearing an apology.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Sorry for what?”

“Oh come on.” Rich groans. “We don’t have to drag this out.”

“Fine.” Michael puts his game down and gets up from his bed, straightening his plain white shirt down. “If you don’t know what you’re sorry for, then this conversation is pointless.” He walks around the bed and is about to make his way for the door when Rich tugs on his wrist without getting up.

“No, wait.” Rich tries to search for the right words to say but comes up with nothing. He _knows_ he should say he’s sorry for snapping, but he also knows Michael will then push him to explain what Jake’s supposed joke meant. He wishes he could easily tell Michael but there’s no way of knowing what would happen next. Michael is a bit of a wild card. Rich doesn’t want him ever thinking he’s prone to cheating again because honestly, he’s not-- especially now that his SQUIP no longer has complete control over him.

Cheating on Brooke wasn’t his proudest moment, and he does everything he could to make up to her. Brooke has already forgiven him a long time ago but Rich couldn’t get rid of that stinging guilt sitting in his chest every single day. He screwed it up with Brooke. He doesn’t want to face that again with Michael.

Michael is the only thing in his life he’s so sure about.

Luckily enough, Michael doesn’t pull away from his hold. He sighs and just looks back at him.

Rich swallows and relents. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have snapped at you. That wasn’t cool.”

Michael doesn’t say anything, and Rich holds his breath. But finally, the taller of the two shrugs his shoulders. “Okay. I’m sorry for pushing you to say something you’re clearly not ready to say.”

Rich lets out a sigh of relief and tugs him closer just to wrap his arms around his middle and bury his face on his stomach. He feels his boyfriend’s fingers playing with his hair gently. They stay quiet for a while, basking in the relief that they’re not fighting anymore.

“I hate it when we fight.” Rich says against the fabric of Michael’s shirt.

Michael chuckles. “It’s a rarity though so I still think we’re doing a pretty good job than most.” He pulls away from Rich’s arms to sit down beside him. “So, do you wanna go out and join your friends at the pool?”

“Nah. We spent the entire afternoon in the ocean. I’d like to stay dry this time.” Rich reaches out to pull Michael closer to his body and tickle his ear with kisses which causes the other boy to laugh. Rich grins proudly and pulls back. “Can’t you and Jake switch rooms?”

“No way, man.” Michael breathes out a laugh. “I don’t think Mrs. Duke is the biggest supporter of our relationship at the moment “

“She doesn’t have to know.”

“ _Dustin_ will know.” Michael reminds him pointedly. “And you know he’s not good at keeping secrets.”

“He’d be too busy getting giddy over Brooke to notice.”

At the mention of Brooke, Michael grows quiet and Rich fights back a wince at that. He really needs to learn how to use his brain before saying whatever the fuck he wants.

He clears his throat. “Look, Michael. About Brooke…”

“You don’t have to--”

“No,” Rich squeezes Michael’s hand reassuringly. “I want to tell you so I can give you peace of mind.”

Michael looks uncertain. “If you’re okay with that...”

Rich clears his throat again. “About Brooke-- yeah, I cheated on her. She was my first girlfriend and I guess I let that inflate my ego. I thought that if I could get a girl like Brooke, then maybe I could get other pretty girls too.”

Michael meets his eyes. “Is that what you really thought, or is that what your SQUIP wanted you to think?”

“I don’t know. Probably both. I wanted to convince myself that I’m…” Rich gestures his hand vaguely in the air. “...relevant. Like, I’m not invisible.”

“I see.” It’s hard to figure out the tone in Michael’s voice, though it’s anything but doubt. “How did Brooke take it?”

“Not well.” Rich groans at the memory and lies down on the bed, throwing his arm over his eyes and trying his very best not to _cringe_ at how he had still tried to lie his way out of trouble even though Brooke had caught him red-handed. He had thought that she was going to slap him like they do in the movies, but she didn’t. She just broke down in front of him and the cheerleader he was about to hook up with. Only a monster would make Brooke cry like that.

“My SQUIP knew that that was going to happen.” He moves his arm and watches Michael lie down beside him. They both stare up at the ceiling. “It was part of her plan.”

“Breaking Brooke’s trust and self-esteem was part of your SQUIP’s plan?”

Rich nods. “When the guys at school found out I cheated on her with a cheerleader and this really cute math geek they’ve been trying to--”

“Don’t they have names, dude?”

“Oh, yeah. Sorry. Erm, I hooked up with Cheryl Ganesh and Momo Hazuki. When the guys at school found out about it, they pretty much celebrated it. I felt like a fucking king at the time. I feel bad about it now, of course. That wasn’t cool at all.” After a fleeting moment of hesitation, Rich turns his head to stare at Michael. “Brooke already forgave me, but I’m still trying to make up for it.”

“She already knows about the SQUIP.” Michael looks back at him. “I’m sure she understands why you did what you thought you had to do.”

“But I don’t blame the SQUIP. I blame _myself._ ”

“And that’s good.” Michael shifts on his side of the bed and faces him, a look of genuine concern clouding his features. “That goes to show that you don’t blame anyone for your decisions. But that doesn’t mean you should linger on those decisions. They’re shitty, yeah, but maybe you should give yourself a break. Brooke has moved on. You should too. You're not a bad person, Rich. Only bad people never own up to their mistakes.”

Rich looks away and stares back up at the ceiling. Michael’s words are easier said than done. He can’t move on-- at least not that easily. He used to be a good kid. The kind of good kid who went to Church every Sunday with his family and made cookies for Santa every Christmas Eve. Never had he thought that he would grow up to behave like those kids who bullied him into thinking he wasn’t worth anything. He became the only thing he never wished to be. No, he couldn’t move on from cheating on Brooke. He couldn’t move on from threatening Jeremy almost every day.

And he couldn’t move on from shoving Michael around and calling him homophobic slurs.

Because even when he did have his SQUIP, those were all his decisions to make at the end of the day.

Could that be the reason why he could still hear his SQUIP whispering in his head every now and then? Because he couldn’t let all of this shit go?

That’s another problem for another day. Thinking about it is just giving him a headache.

“Um, you know, about the prom…” He decides to shift the subject instead as he carefully sits up. He rubs the back of his neck, the mere idea of prom already making him a tad nervous. Michael doesn’t seem like the type of person who would enjoy prom, especially since he tends to skip all those house parties he got invited to. So if he does decide to pass up on this one too, then Rich would definitely do the same. It would still suck to miss out on his senior prom, but it wouldn’t even be fun anyway if he wouldn’t be able to go with his boyfriend.

He’s always dreamed of making a grand promposal in front of everyone just so he could get a few hoots and an applause of approval from everyone. But now that he’s dating Michael, he knows that that’s not exactly something his antisocial boyfriend would appreciate. The guy is never good at being put on the spot and Rich doesn’t want to pressure him into saying yes just because everyone’s watching them.

 _Private and simple,_ that’s how he had always imagined his promposal would be ever since they started dating.

“Yeah?” Michael sits up beside him. “What about the prom?”

Rich tries to shrug as nonchalantly as he could but he senses it only came off rather awkward. He clears his throat to cover it up but it does nothing but worsen his chance of looking casual. “You… uh, like… I don’t know.” He let outs a quiet, nervous laugh. “Are you going?”

“Um…” Michael’s tone is unreadable and that doesn’t seem good. He waits for the other to continue. “That depends.”

“Depends on what?” Rich looks back at him, failing to fight back the hopeful tone in his question. 

Michael has a humored grin on his face. “Depends on whether or not you’re going with someone else?”

“Of course not!” Rich is quick to deny, shocked. “I wanna go with you, dude!”

Michael laughs. “Really? Because for a second there, I thought you were being hesitant because you’ve been thinking of going with Mr. Reyes instead.”

“Oh.” Rich pauses. “I didn’t know he was an option. But now that you’ve mentioned it--”

“Shut up.” Michael laughs again and pushes him lightly by the shoulder. Rich grins, pleased that the tension is no longer in the air. Still, he wants to make this promposal right even though Michael has already made it clear that he wants to go to the dance with him. Call him cheesy, but he still wants this to happen because it’s one of the few things he has been looking forward to doing.

“Let me do this again.” Rich faces Michael, reaching out to take his hand in his. He stares right back at him and tries his best not to laugh which is not the easiest thing to do at the moment when Michael, himself, couldn’t stop chuckling at how cheesy they both are being. “Wait, stop laughing!” Rich couldn’t help but laugh along.

“Okay okay okay!” Michael covers his mouth with his free hand and takes a deep breath before putting his hand back down and focusing back on the blond. “The floor is yours.”

“God, now I’m embarrassed.” Rich shakes his head as though shaking the warmth off of his face.

“Dude, I’m just as embarrassed. This is so weird.” Michael still couldn’t help but stay in his giggly mode. It’s not as bad as when he’s high on weed but it’s still a pretty hilarious sight to see.

“Then I’m just gonna say it right away.” Rich straightens up, an embarrassed yet eager grin on his face. “Michael Mell, will you go to the prom with me?”

Michael laughs again but before Rich could react to that, he leans in and presses his lips against in an almost clumsy manner. Rich accepts the kiss anyway, smiling in it and letting the taller teen nudge him down the mattress. As soon as they break contact, he looks up at Michael who smiles down at him.

“You didn’t have to ask, you know.”

Rich shrugs sheepishly. “I’m a hopeless romantic.”

“You better not bring me a corsage.”

“I was actually hoping you would bring me one.”

“Dork.”

“What can I say, you’re a great influence.”

“Oh wow, that’s--”

Rich doesn’t let him finish whatever witty comeback he has in mind because reaches up to kiss his lips again. Michael doesn’t seem to mind his way of shutting him up.

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know if you're interested in knowing what happens next!


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